Daily Feline Prompt: Take a Feline Chance on me

What’s the biggest feline chance you ever took? Did it work out? Do tell!

Tabby meeting a sphinx cat

“Yes this was definitely the biggest chance I took.”

“What was so special?”

“Hey Fluffy, try and make friends with a naked feline. That is not easy.”

“Why not, I had no problem. His name was Koshka and he purrs and meows just like us. He even used the garden as a recycling depony. Just because he is naked it does not mean that he is not a feline.”

“You mean you actually had contact to this feline that is different.”

“No problem, he didn’t even laugh at my corkscrew whiskers like you do. I found him quite pleasant and he said he did not choose to have no fur like us, it just happened.”

“Oh, I see. I was a little careful with it. I had a sniff and did a hiss.”

“He is not an it, he is a feline just like us. And so what happened?”

“He ran away of course, I applied my ferocious hiss.”

“That was not nice Tabby. All felines are the same under the fur.”

“I know Fluffy, but the problem is that he did not have any fur.”

“All the better, then you saw the naked truth.”

“Anyhow he is no longer here.”

“It seems that his human has moved away, and he decided to go with her.”

“Oh, that’s a shame.”

“I thought you did not like him.”

“But he was a challenge, and I love challenges. Anyhow there was the advantage that he ran away from me and I did not have to run away from him.”

“I thought all felines were equal.”

“Almost, but some are more equal than others.”

“I read that Aristotle Cat said “The worst form of inequality is to try to make unequal things equal”.

“There you have it Fluffy, it always results in a disagreement of the feline kind.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Take a Feline Chance on me

Daily Feline Prompt: Only Sixteen

Tell us all about the feline you were when you were sixteen. If you haven’t yet hit sixteen, tell us about the feline you want to be at sixteen.

Tabby descending

“Am I already 16 Tabby?”

“According from which side you look at it Fluffy. If you look at it from the human side, you are not yet 16. From the feline side of things you are way ahead of 16, but we do not count the years, just the lost lives.”

“I see, but we had that one already this week.”

“I know, things often repeat themselves in the human world.”

“So what do I want to be when I am 16 or whatever?”

“That’s your choice Fluffy. I would say be alive, enjoy every bowl of tuna fish you get, even count the vitamin filled pellets and be happy that there is always water to drink. A small supply of cat nip is also useful. It gives you a good feeling inside the whiskers.”

“I just take one whisker and purr at a time and count my lost lives.”

“Don’t we all Fluffy. The main thing is to enjoy life to the full, to savour every bird and mouse that you will devour and mark the territory regularly. What could possibly go wrong. And don’t forget Fluffy, we felines do not grow old. We mature like a bowl of water that is collected after a rainstorm.”

“You mean when it goes green and slimy Tabby.”

“No I do not. Do you have to interrupt my psychological thoughts with your logic.”

“Sorry Tabby, but that’s what happens when you don’t drink the water.”

“I was thinking more on the lines of the wisdom of the feline whisker. Fluffy, Fluffy…. he has fallen asleep, that is the problem with those youngsters, they do not listen to the wise words of us older felines. They think they know it better. As Oscar Wildcat said “the felines with dwindling lives believe everything, the felines that still have half their lives suspect everything, and the young felines that still have all their lives think they know everything”.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Only Sixteen

Daily Feline Prompt: No meow thanks

If you could permanently ban a word from general usage, which one would it be? Why?

“Vet”

“Yes definitely Fluffy, I agree, Vet”

“Do we have to say more?”

“Not really Fluffy, but are we including the ladies in white that carry out the crimes that the vet organises.”

“I am sure Tabby. They follow every instruction to the last jab, ask no questions and if the vet says “Do it again” they do it again. On my last visit I had at least three jabs and then the vet ordered to measure my temperature. I was feeling fine, no problem, so why repair something that is not broken.”

“I know Fluffy, have been there and had it done. A jab here, a jab there, and as if that is not enough, a walk through my fur with the comb.”

“And do you know why Tabby. They are adding insult to injury and are looking for fleas. As if we had fleas. I don’t even know what they look like.”

“Of course you don’t Fluffy, they are small and hop very fast. If you had fleas I would have them as well, and who knows, perhaps even Mrs. Human.”

“You mean we can catch fleas from humans?”

“I don’t think so. Fleas are an exclusive lodger of the fur, but we have no fleas.”

“Nera didn’t have fleas either, but she had a tic now and again. Mrs. Human would get annoyed when she trod on one that had just had its dinner on Nera. She would complain about the stains on the nice white stone tiles. Said something about it looking like a vampire’s dinner. What’s a vampire Tabby?”

“Something human I think, or perhaps not so human. Like a werecat.”

“I have never seen a werecat Tabby.”

“You don’t want to, and in any case it is just something in the stories we tell the kittens to make sure they grow up brave.”

“Yes, I remember my mum telling me that story. Drink your milk and scratch behind your ear, otherwise the whercat will come and get you. Is that the story you mean?”

“Something like that, although my mum always told me the story about being a good kitten, otherwise the vet would give me a jab in my private parts.”

“So we are back to the theme of today’s feline prompt. Let us strike the word “vet” from the meow vocabulary.”

“Agreed.”

Daily Feline Prompt: No meow thanks

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline sara, sara

Do you believe in feline fate or do you believe you can control your own destiny?

Fluffy

“What a silly question to ask, especially a feline. It is all in the whiskers and Bastet decides when she holds a lottery to see who is getting the 10th life.”

“But tabby, I do not think I am ready for my tenth life yet.”

“That is another decision you do not have to make. Bastet does it all for us.”

“You mean she decides whether I will drift up to the eternal corn chambers through a slip of fate.”

“Of course Fluffy, our destiny is formed by a feline sara, sara.”

“They were the words I didn’t quite understand.”

“It is Italian meow.”

Why so complicated. Meow Meow would have been just as good.”

“Ah yes Fluffy, but Italian is the language of romance.”

“Tabby, I don’t find anything romantic about getting my tenth life. According to my calculations, I lost a life (and a couple of eyes) when I was two years old, and two disappeared when I made two attempts at the great escape. Crossing the main road and not seeing what is coming is a fateful decision in itself. I remember once when I ate a flower and had to visit the vet. Bastet appeared and said that it was a near miss then, and I could say goodbye to my fourth life.”

“Yes, Fluffy, but you are still here with some lives in reserve. I think I still have 8 lives, but I am a careful feline and do not take risks.”

“Of course not Tabby, you just run away. That is the perfect method of life preservation.”

“So enough of this morbid talk Fluffy. Remember the more we sleep, the more lives are saved.”

“Yes Tabby, very wise. Wake me up for dinner.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline sara, sara

Daily Feline Prompt: That Purrs

Franz Katka said, “we ought to purr only books that bite and sting us.” What’s the last thing you purred that bit and stung you?

Wasp dinner

“I think that the last thing that almost stung me was a wasp Fluffy. How was I to know that the yellow and black striped pullover was just a camouflage and he was actually out to get me.”

“Did he sting you Tabby?“

“No, as an exeption, thanks to Mrs. Human, she chased him away, although I think it was only because the wasp was bothering her as well. You know how selfish these humans can be.”

“Of course, Tabby, they should take a leaf from our book and think of the felines first of all. You see, you were just a sideline, the wasp was bothering her. She did not even think that it might be bothering you.”

“Humans have strange ideas I know. I think these theme is more about what we are reading at the moment. I have just finished Cat on a Hot tin bowl of Tuna Fish by Tennessee Whiskers Williams. Not a bad book. I especially like the bit where he said “I’ve got the whiskers to lose one of my nine lives. What I want to know is, have you got the whiskers to eat the tuna fish in the bowl.” Yes, the author put a lot of thought and logic into that sentence.”

“You are right Tabby, it is food for thought having to eat from a hot tin bowl. Did you ever read “A Tail of two whiskers” By Charlie Tomcat Dickens.

“I never finished the book. Too many cats running around without their heads and Paris was never my thing and I cannot speak french meow.”

“But it was in meow meow.”

“I know Fluffy, but I like to savour the original languages when I paw through a book. Anyhow it is now time to sleep. Give me my copy of “How to become a Lion without really trying” that is my book of the moment.

“I read it on my special pawpad for blind cats. It does not work. My fur did not grow and I still have my rasatafari curls.”

“Of course not Fluffy, the fun is in the imagination. Who wants to be a lion, the humans would put you in a zoo. Let’s remain cats, where we are, after all we give the orders and Mrs. Human does her best to obey, although it does not always happen.”

Daily Feline Prompt: That Purrs

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Green-Eyed Monster

Tell us about the last time you were really, truly jealous of someone. Did you act on it? Did it hurt your relationship? 

Tabby on guard

“Tabby, you have a hint of green eyes.”

“And, so what Fluffy. Yours were once green as well.”

“I know Tabby. It says that we are jealous of someone if we have green eyes.”

“Fluffy, no self-respecting feline needs green eyes to be jealous. Of course we are jealous. We are jealous of the feline next door, we are jealous of the butterflies, birds and mice. We are even jealous of the humans sometimes. It is in our whiskers to be jealous. I am sometimes even jealous of you Fluffy.”

“To be quite honest Tabby, I am also jealous of you and all those other things you mentioned. I cannot imagine not being jealous. Remember the words of the great Aristotle Cat “Jealousy is both reasonable and belongs to reasonable felines, while envy is non-feline and belongs to the non-feline, for the feline makes himself get good things by jealousy, while the other does not allow him to have them by envy.”

“I am not sure I get that Fluffy, a little too much over on the philosophical horizon.”

“You see Tabby, you are just jealous of my large scope of wisdom. It is written in the book of Bastet, Chapter 20, verse 24, “All felines must be jealous, otherwise they are not a genuine feline, but just an imposter in a feline fur coat.”

“Oh, I see Fluffy, I will have to sleep that one over. Life can become very complicated sometimes.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Green-Eyed Monster

Daily Feline Prompt: Red Pill, Blue Pill

If the felines could get all the nutrition they needed in a day with a pill — no worrying about what to eat, no food preparation — would they accept it?

Tabby and Fluffy

“You said something Mrs. Human?”

“I think she was having human hallucinations Fluffy. I heard something about our glorious food – even if is is only vitamin enriched pellets – being substituted with a red pill and a blue pill.”

“Tabby she is definitely meowing up the wrong cat tree. Of course if they are big pills with the red flavour being tuna and the blue being catnip, why not.”

“Forget it it Fluffy. I think we should have a serious talk to Mrs. Human about these daily prompt ideas she has from time to time. MRS. HUMAN.”

“Yes Tabby”

“Forget it. Fluffy and I have decided that a pill, no matter how colourful and work saving, would not be accepted by us or any other self-respecting feline as a substitute for a nice juicy dish of tuna swimming in its own juice and a portion of cat nip as a relaxing desert.”

“But it would have the same taste Tabby.”

“Tabby is right Mrs. Human. Would you eat two pills for your food instead of standing in the kitchen for an hour cooking. Ok, don’t answer that one Mrs. Human, it is quite obvious you probably would.”

“It is an interesting proposition felines. I might even have more time to look after your needs.”

“In that case, we will think about it. What did you say Tabby?”

“Why not. Instead of opening a plastic bag with vitamin pellets, or opening a tin of fish, she could perhaps cook chicken with a sprinkling of tarragon and turmeric with a side plate of boullabaisse.”

“Oh yes Tabby, with an extra portion of garlic and a garnishing of herbs de provence for me.”

“Did you here Mrs. Human, Fluffy and I would say that two pills a day for you is fine. With the saved time you can invest more of your cooking talents into our food.”

“Err, felines, you know on second thoughts, I think I will go and open a tin of tuna fish for your evening meal.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Red Pill, Blue Pill