Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Sanctuary

Tabby 03.07 (2)

“Mrs. Human, sit somewhere else, I need isolation. A place for myself where I can relax and let my medidtative thoughts carry me to another place.”

“I am sorry Tabby? I know I am a mere human, but this place you call “my home” does happen to belong to me as well. I also live here and at the moment I am siting on the porch”

“Ok, but stay on the porch and do not walk around my sanctuary in the garden at the moment.”Where are you going now?”

“I am going into the living room. There is something I want to look at.”

“OK, but avoid treading on the carpet, I will be laying there this evening.”

“But at the moment you are laying on the lawn.”

“In the evening it will be carpet time, my inside sactuary, and I really do not want human foot prints all over it.”

“In that case I will have a lay down on my bed.”

“No, that will not work. Laying down on the bed is only for after lunch sleeps and now it is the middle of the afternoon.”

“I did not realise I would have to ask your permission Tabby.”

“Of course not, you should just consider my needs but it would be ok now, Just remember to reserve a place for me next to you when you take your next midday sleep. We must have organisation, cannot have humans taking over my private places when they feel like it and I need a place belonging to my meditative moments.”

“Am I allowed to fill your food bowl with perhaps some tuna fish or is that another part of your sanctuary.”

“Don’t ask silly questions Mrs. Human, my bowl filled with tuna fish is my sanctuary.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Sanctuary

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Clock

Tabby

I really do not see the problem with all this clock stuff. I am glad there are not so many clocks around now, distubing with their ticks. I remember in my kitten days there was a constant tick, tick, in the background with these human clock things. Today life has quietened down thanks to a few feline clock developments and I can now take one of my sleeps without disturbance, although I usually have one ear open, supported by a few whiskers, just to be on the safe side.

It seems everything is digital today. What the humans do not realise is that we felines were doing digital in the olden days, way back when we were clawing our symbols in hieroglyphics in stone. We did not need time, we just had a feeling to sleep or go hunting. You get a sudden twitch in the whiskers, a tense feeling in the paws and the nose of course. If the wind is blowing all sorts of scents will be delivered as a signal to go into action. Who needs time? Time is an  imaginative sequence of inframediate signals, a transitional psychedelic pattern, being filtered through the whiskers and analysed carefully in the tail. Are you following? No, it does not matter, the thoughts of a feline are difficult for a human to comprehend. We are naturally years ahead in our development. We do not have 9 lives for nothing, they are needed for a full analysis to enable our internal clock to function perfectly.

Do you ever see me looking at a clock or watching the digital signals on my Pawpad or Pawphone. Of course not, they are only there for decoration. The time sense of a feline cannot be explained, “it exists, therefore it is” as the great feline philospher Renée Paws Descats said.

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Clock

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Punishment

Fluffy Claw

“What is that picture hanging on the wall next to the your sleeping cushion Tabby.”

“That is my latest creation. It is called “The Claw” and will make me famous in the feline world. It is a symbol for our bravery against the foe, and a guiding light for our persistance in the slavery of the humans.”

“That is not very nice, Tabby. After all I do for you, clean your recycling tray, feed you and give you water and the claw is now a symbol of domination against the humans.”

“But you must admit it is very impressive. Its marks remain on human skin to emphasise our dominance.”

“You marks are scratches and they hurt. How would you like it if I hung a photo of a human nail on the wall.”

“It is not the same Mrs. Human. Our claws are our weapons, our defence against wrong doings, and a reminder to follow feline instructions. Remember the last time you got a punishing scratch. It was when your arm happened to cross my path when I wanted to sleep on your bed in the early morning hours and you told me to leave. It was only a small warning to remind you that we are in charge.”

“Yes, but not in my bedroom. At least only during the day and not night.”

“Day and night does not exist in meow, we sleep according to our whiskers and not according to stupid human laws. In any case human finger nails are not the same as feline claws. Our claws are to determine leadership, to spread respect for our feline race. Human finger nails are more decoration than tools of punishment. Imagine a feline with painted claws.”

“Now that is an idea Tabby, what colour would you prefer. Ouch – you see you scratched me.”

“Of course I did, that is what claws are for. And do not even think about painting my claws. I would be the laugh of the black claw gang.”

“The black claw gang. Are they dangerous?”

“We felines are never dangerous, it is just a matter of keeping your distance and showing respect. Come to think of it, can you get nail varnish in black – Tiddles, my pawbook colleague,  would be jealous. I could take a feline selfie. No forget it, you would probably paint each claw in a different colour with some sort of human “isn’t that pretty” idea.”

“It would be no problem Tabby. I could even file them to look better.”

“OK, on second thoughts, all claws painted black and filed to sbharp points, yes that would really impress my feline colleagues.”

“On seond thoughts Tabby, let’s leave it as it is. I do not think I want a Tabby feline with razor sharp black claws. The Tabby “M” on the forehead does the job nicely.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Punishment

Daily Feline Prompt: The slow feline

Tabby

Time for a sleep and take a rest
No need to hurry , just pawing my best
I might take a walk, but I feel so tired
It is all in the whiskers, they are so highly wired
I could go find a mouse, if it wasn’t so far
The problem is always to know where they are
Life is exhausting I am counting my lives
There are not many left, but I will survive
Look there is a butterfly, now that is a trump
They are very tasty, but to catch it I must jump
I do not feel like jumping, using too much strength
It would wear me out, to go to such a length
Life is exhausing, my brain needs a rest
Sleep is what I need, that would be the best
What do I hear, I now have a plan
There is movement in the air, distinctly hear a can
Time for a move, I now have a wish
My bowl is being filled with some tuna fish
It is time for action, I will now take a seat
Time to move fast, there is food to eat.

Daily Feline Prompt: The Slow Feline

Daily Feline Prompt: The Carefree Feline

Pete's House Waltham 15.07 (12)

“Mrs. Human, I object to having unknown feline photos on my blog. It downgrades my page.”

“But I asked you to come outside for a photo and you hid in the back room, so I thought I would show one of the wonderful felines I met when I was away.”

“That is the problem Mrs. Human. When you begin to think it is never good. Strange felines are unwelcome and I did not hide in the back room, I decided that I wanted peace and quiet, and dimmed lighting effects for a carefree feline life.”

“Are you sure it was not because there was a storm outside with thunder and lightening and you are afraid.”

“Me, afraid, never. Although it was raining, and I have a distinct allergy to descending water.”

“You see, you are frightened of the thunder.”

“Of course not, it just disturbs my sleep concentration. As the great feline politician Harold Whiskers Wilson said “the greatest asset a tabby feline can have is the ability to get a good long sleep, no matter whether storm or rain” so to ensure that I lead a carefree life, I would suggest that you now leave, close the door and return when it stops raining.”

“What about dinner.”

“Later Mrs. Human, I cannot digest food and sleep at the same time. And close the door when you go, the noise of the thunder is desroying my carefree life.”

“Of course Tabby.”

Daily Feline Prompt: The Carefree Feline

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Depth

Tabby

“Mrs. Human, this is most inconvenient.”

“Why Tabby, what is the problem?”

“The problem is that I am accustomed to writing my words of feline wisdom in the afternoon and not the evening.”

“Yes, I know, it seems that the prompt arrive a little later today.”

“A little later? Typical human. If a feline would be in charge this would not happen.”

“But Tabby, you cannot tell the time.”

“Tell the time! Another one of those human basics. We felines do not tell the time, we feel the time. I now feel that the time has passed for my daily excursion into the world of literature, my inspiration is waining. My talents are being starved, because a human has no whiskers.”

“Of course humans have whiskers.”

“But only the tom humans. We believe in whiskers for all in the feline world, it is part of our sensory system. Equality for all felines. Who needs time when you have whiskers. And do not forget Bastet was a female feline.”

“Ok Tabby, but we now live in the world of humans, and today we are a little later with pawing your blog. So what do you have to say about depth?”

“Depth? I am not sure that exists in the meow dictionary. Just a moment, of course I have something to say about depth. I am now relaxing on the lawn, trying to relax on the lawn.”

“Is something wrong Tabby?”

“Tell your Mowey that he should not cut the lawn so short.”

“I think the lawn is looking good.”

“It might be looking good, but it does not feel so good. It is too short and sharp for my delicate body. I have to keep changing my position because the short grass is prodding my luxury body.”

“You think I should change the depth of the cutting mechanism?”

“Definitely, so now finish my blog. I have an appointment with a bowl of food and water and afterwards sleep. I feel it in my whiskers.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Depth

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Feast

Tabby

“I’m hungry Mrs. Human, what are you serving for my evening meal?”

“There is a bowl of food ready to eat for you.”

“I am talking about food, the real thing, something that was once alive, not the product of a machine. Who knows what those vitamin pellets contain.”

“But Tabby, they are full of vitamins and very nutritious. The vet told me that a feline does not really need anything else. They are the perfect solution to the needs of a feline. He advised to always make sure there is plenty of water to drink with them.”

“For once I agree with the vet Mrs. Human. You do need plenty of water when eating the hard, dry, tasteless vitamin pellets. Otherwise they tend to stick in your throat. I am sure theyare not real, something assembled in a laboratory.”

“But Tabby they are chicken flavoured and I though you like chicken.”

“Those pellets have never seen a chicken Mrs. Human, believe me.”

“Would you prefer the beef flavoured pellets?”

“They all taste the same. Put it in your mouth, wash it down with water. There is absolutely no opportunity to expand my gourmet flavour buds. How would you like to eat everything in pellets?”

“That is not the same Tabby. Humans also eat vegetable and salads and felines are not able to digest that. Some humans are vegetarian and never eat meat.”

“Why not?”

“Because they find it cruel to kill and animal just for its meat.”

“Strange animals humans. My mum always taught us that if it moves and breathes and smells OK, then kill it and eat it. And there we have it again, have you ever seen a feline kill a vitamin pellet. No, of course not, becaues they have never lived. They are born dead. So what am I getting for the evening meal?”

“Just to keep you happy, I will open a tin of tuna fish.”

“Mrs. Human, we have a river down the path. Why not add a touch of reality to my food and go catch a fish. you could debone it of course, and serve it for my evening meal. Tinned food is not exactly a feast for a feline.”

“Than you don’t want tuna fish for tea?”

“I did not exactly say I do not want tuna fish, just suggsted an alternative. Ok, forget it, but serve it with feeling and a little imagination. Not just empty it into my bowl, let it swim in its own juice.”

“But don’t leave the fish and just drink the juice.”

“I am thinking about it. I might save the fish for later.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline feast