Daily Feline Prompt: Feline 180 Degrees

Tell us about a time you did a 180 — changed your views on something, reversed a decision, or acted in a way you ordinarily don’t.

Tabby and Fluffy

 

“Did you see me Tabby, I did it.”

“Did what?”

“I escaped, all on my own.”

“And? All I heard was a worried Mrs. Human who discovered that she forgot to close the window and Fluffy had disappeared. Mr. Swiss was out and her overgrown kitten was in the bathroom, so she had to drop everything and go on a search party on her own.”

“I know, she found me.”

“Fluffy you have to realise that blind felines do not take walks. You could get lost.”

“What’s blind? Forget it, I have asked that one before. I did get lost, it was fun, I had no idea where I was, but everything smelt great. I found a nice piece of land where other felines had been before me and marked their places. It was just getting interesting when I smelt mouse nearby and then I heard those funny noises that humans make and Mrs. Human appeared. She even seemed to be glad to see me. She was not very happy about carrying me home.”

“I don’t suppose she was Fluffy, you do not exactly sit in her arms licking her and muttering sounds of happiness do you?”

“Of course not, I was unhappy. She had captured me again, but I struggled all the way home.”

“I know, I heard her screams of pain when you scratched her on the way.”

“But I proved my point Tabby, that is the main thing.”

“Ok, so that was the daily excitement. How Fluffy turned 180 degrees and did the great escape.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline 280 Degrees

Daily Feline Prompt: Do not disturb

How do you manage your privacy? Are there certain places where you will not sleep? Information you’ll never share with other felines? Or do you assume information about your sleeping places is accessible anyway?

Tabby

“Tabby. Tabby. TABBY”

“Fluffy what are you mega meowing about. Can’t you see I am trying to get a few hours feline sleep. Do not make such a noise, and above all do not disturb.”

“But I have something important to tell you.”

“Fluffy you never have anything important to tell me. Tuna fish was on the menu yesterday, the mice are all out in the fields eating corn and the birds are sitting in the trees, so what could be so important that you want to disturb my sleep.”

“Well it’s just that I thought you might be interested to know…..”

“To know what? The only thing I am interested in is a quiet sleep with no disturbances.”

“Exactly that it what I wanted to tell you.”

“Can’t it wait, I have my eyes closed and was just counting mice to get myself to sleep.”

“I do that as well Tabby, although I prefer counting butterflies. They are so pretty when they flutter around. But there is something else.”

“I am not interested in your preoccupation with countng butterflies so let it wait, I am sure it is not as important as a few hours sleep. I am behind with my rest today, so I have to catch up. And what is that noise and that strange smell?”

“That’s what I wanted to tell you Tabby. Mrs. Human has a visit from a human friend.”

“How nice for her, I hope she enjoys it. Thank goodness the word friend does not exist in meow.”

“That’s not the point Tabby. We do not have time to discuss whether we have friends or not. In this case the human friend as brought her dog with her, I think they call them Alsatians. That is probably the smell you notice and the noise of it barking. I think it wants to get to know you. Tabby, Tabby, where are you.

Tabby is a strange feline. There she was all comfortable having a sleep and now she has disappeared through the cat flap breaking all records of feline speed.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Do not disturb

Daily Feline Prompt: Bubba the toughest of them all

Migros cat choosing a flower in Langedorf

“Look Tabby, have you seen this on you pawpad. Mrs. Human’s online colleague Lee is telling us about his cat Bubby who is now living his tenth life with Bastet, perhaps he has met Nera.”

“Who knows Fluffy, we can ask her the next time she floats down from the eternal corn chambers.”

“Of course I know Bubba, he is known as Big Bubba here and very much respected.”

“Hello Nera, nice to see you again. Can you tell us all about him. It might give us a few tips if we have a threat to our territory.”

“No problem Tabby and Fluffy, but my tip is always to run for the cat flap. It is the safest escape any time. We are not all Bubba’s. So here it goes:

“We had a big black tomcat, name of Bubba, who died in late 2011 at 22 years of age. Bubba was a very unusual cat. He ruled every cat and dog that he met. He’d beat the living daylights out of any cat that challenged him and once the cat surrendered he’d become best of pals with him even going to the extent of leading a band of cats and protecting all cats in the area. One Rottweiler owner made the mistake of letting his dog go after Bubba. After all, it’s only a cat. The owner didn’t like the vet bill for getting his dog stitched back up again once Bubba was done modifying the dog’s undercarriage.

Bubba would bring home kittens and females, set them up under the house and protect them. He’d tirelessly patrol his territory. We never had to worry about anything on our property with Bubba around.

Bubba had many other very remarkable characteristics, many of them more doglike than catlike but all of them unusual in *any* animal.

So, Bubba died. Grandchild was desolate, so were we. It was definitely a family member rather than a pet we had lost. I remember remarking “Well, if there’s such a thing as reincarnation, this cat – if anyone – will be back if he wants to be.”

Fast forward to early 2014 – five hundred miles north in the new home.

“Meow!” Open the front door, straight in walks a stocky little black and white tomcat. Has a snack, introduces himself to the other cats, settles down and has a nice nap. He moved in the moment we opened the door. All the houses along our road, he chose ours.

A week or two goes by and we realize that this cat is displaying exactly the same unusual behaviors as Bubba did.

Grandchild comes to visit, he’s in the living room, PB (the cat) walks in. Grandchild yells “It’s Bubba!” Cat walks straight up to him and hops into his lap and settles down – never having met this child before. They spend the rest of the visit together. As Bubba and he used to.

PB goes on to rule the area, protect and collect lesser cats, beat the snot out of dogs, and generally display exactly the same behavior as Bubba did. Even to the extent of favorite foods and hunting habits. He also exactly filled the hole that Bubba left. Something we never thought would happen due to the rareness of cats such as Bubba.

Remember, this cat found us and moved himself in.

Myself, I’d say the cat is a good argument for reincarnation. If anyone could persuade the afterlife to do what he wanted, it would have been him.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Bubba the toughest of them all

Daily Feline Prompt: Felines are a Mystery

Tell us something most people probably don’t know about felines.

Cats in a window in Oxlow Lane

“This sounds interesting Tabby.”

“It is, I got it from a forum site that Mrs. Human belongs to and it was especially posted for us from a guy calle Lee that lives in the States. He is also owned by felines. One of his felines is the boss. read what he tells us.”

“Well, here at Cat Central life goes on apace.

Numbnuts the neighbour has acquired another three cats that he keeps outside most of time and generally ignores. (Why the hell do idiots like that even want to have a pet seeing as they just neglect and ignore them?)

Anyway, one of the big dogs (Alsatian sized) from the end of the road was on the loose last night. Known to be a cat killer. Wandering around the neighbourhood.

Those three cats hang out on the porch of their owner’s house.

Along comes the dog. He’s going to go after the cats on the porch.

Around the side of the house comes our tomcat who has befriended these hapless cats.

Tomcat places himself between the dog and his friends, does the inflating cat trick and just stands there, silent, staring at the dog.

Woof, growl, feint – doesn’t work. Cat won’t be intimidated. Cat stands there like Chuck Norris in a shoot out – just radiating “Come get some, Motherf….”

Dog doesn’t know what this cat is up to. Cat hasn’t read the “Cats are afraid of dogs” rulebook. Cat is also very, very confident and very, very calm. Cat may have tactical nuke hidden on his person or something.

Dog shuts up, turns around and goes back to his house, looking nervously over his shoulder, Tomcat is following close behind to make sure he (the dog) gets the hell out of Dodge.

You could offer me ten thousand quid for that cat and I wouldn’t sell him…”

“So you see Fluffy, that’s the way to do it.”

“Great Tabby, you do it first and I will follow.”

“I will have to think about it.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Felines are a Mystery

Daily Feline Prompt: Whiskers Check

We all have complicated histories. When was the last time your past experiences informed a major decision you’ve made?

Migros delivery with Fluffy“Tabby I think I am about to make a major decision.”

“You are Fluffy. Tell me about it.”

“I need some advice. Which bag shall I begin with. The one at the back , second from left looks interesting. I can see some butter. I love butter.”

“I know you do Fluffy, but it is not my sort of thing.”

“Mrs. Human always gives me a small piece of butter in the morning.”

“Of course she does, when you sit in front of the fridge and wait for it. I am not a butter cat myself, I prefer a piece of noodle or even those potato chip things that humans have.”

“Just a minute Tabby, I can smell meat in the bag on the right. I think that is Mrs. Human’s dinner.”

“Let’s have a sniff Fluffy. Yes, the aromas of fresh kill reach my nose. That’s the bag we should tear apart.”

“What do you two felines think you are doing with my shopping. Take your claws out of those bags.”

“But Mrs. Human, we only wanted to save you the trouble of unpacking all that wonderful aroma filled food you have brought from your hunting trip in the supermarket. By the way, did you remember to get some tins of tuna fish?”

“Tabby I am still feeding you on the 100 tins you and Fluffy ordered on your pawpads with my credit card.”

“Oh yes, we forget, although the permanent servings of tuna fish are becoming a little boring. On my pawpad app for the supermarket it shows a special offer for Norwegian salmon, 2 for one it says which would be ideal. One for Fluffy and one for me. If Fluffy does not like salmon, it would just be two for me.”

“Tabby I like salmon, so forget it. we can share.”

“Fluffy, felines do not share remember. Book of Bastet, chapter 2, verse 3 “Felines look after themselves in the first place. No. 1 is I, No. 2 is me and No. 3 is myself. There should be nothing leftt afterwards.”

“Ok Tabby of course. Then you order yours on your pawpad and I will order mine.”

“Just a minute felines, who is paying for this salmon feast.”

“Err, I know. She who has a pawcard.”

“No way. I now have a new credit card and it is not paw accessible.”

“Tabby, looks like another tin of boring tuna fish tonight.”

“I know Fluffy, beggars cannot be choosers.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Whiskers Check

Daily Feline Prompt: Meowmares

Describe the last meowmare you remember having. What do you think it meant?

Fluffy on the bed

“Fluffy stop making such strange noises in your sleep.”

“If they are in my sleep Tabby I cannot stop making them and I am having a meowmare.”

“Oh, I see, that is not so good. What is the problem.”

“A big fish was following me and I escaped.

“That is good Fluffy.”

“And then you arrived and caught the fish.”

“Well that is a good result. I rescued you from a fate worst than being in the same dream as the ginger tom from next door.”

“Wait Tabby, the ginger tom was also in the dream.”

“And what happened?”

“You dropped the big fish and ran away and the ginger tom eat it.”

“That is a real meowmare Fluffy.”

“And then he died.”

“The ginger tom?”

“No, the big fish.”

“Then it was a happy ending after all.”

“I am not so sure Tabby. Mrs. Human is calling, She said something about a plate of tuna fish.”

“Well, what are we waiting for.”

“Perhaps the fish is still alive.”

“Who cares, as it says in the book of Bastet Chapter 84, verse 3, if it breathes kill it. So come on Fluffy, first come, first served or dream on.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Meowmares

Daily Feline Prompt: Fill in the meow

Two cats walk into a chicken coup

Feeding time for the chickens and rooster in Feldbrunnen

“What do you think you are doing here. This is reserved for my hen harem and we do not need any feline influence. You are making them nervous.”

“It is part of today’s assignment. We were supposed to walk into a bar, but they don’t serve felines in a bar and we don’t drink, so we thought we would go somewhere more suitable.”

“I am Harald the rooster and I do not need felines. I had enough when the fox thought he could get away with it, but thanks to my talents I scared the fox away. If you want an egg, you are welcome. They sell them at the entrance.”

“But felines don’t eat eggs, we are carnivores.”

“Are you indeed, then go to the field next door, the cows would be pleased to see you.”

“But they are so big and make a loud noise.”

“And that frightens you, so you visit my girls and think you can make off with one of them. Forget it. Mabel, Florrie, Daisy come here. Show these two felines what you hens are made of.”

“Do you want it vocal or physical Harald.”

“Do it vocal and if they stay you can try physical.”

“Cluck, cluck, cluck – cock a doodle do”

“Oh my ears Tabby.”

“Mine too Fluffy, I think we will leave. If that is vocal, who knows what physical will be.”

“Another victory ladies for us. Look at those two cats running.”

“Shall we go after them Harald. We could get some fur samples for your trophies to hang up next to the fox tail.”

“No leave it ladies, I don’t think they will be back so soon.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Fill in the meow