Go back in time to an event you think could have played out differently for you. Let alternate history have its moment: tell us what could, would or should have happened? I don’t think so, we felines never change anything, we always do it the right way at the beginning. It is the humans that make it all so complicated. Just read the following, a simple case of a feline deciding the right place doing the right thing and the human – again confused.
“Tabby, do you think you could move to a more suitable place. I want to deck the table for the evening meal.”
“Mrs. Human, I don’t think Tabby is interested, she is relaxing and sleeping.”
“But Fluffy, it is not the best place for a feline to sleep. She is sleeping on the table.”
“Of course she is sleeping on the table. Her feline motivation tells her that this is the best place to sleep at the moment. Humans do not decide on such important tasks. She is now in feline nirvana, dreaming of a perfect life in a perfect place, sleeping on the perfect table.”
“Did someone say something. Please be a little quieter, I cannot concentrate on my sleep.”
“Yes Tabby, you are in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
“Mrs. Human, I will make the important decisions and I find this table ideal at the moment. It is cool to my silky fur and if it would become uncomfortable I can always change my position to one of the chairs.”
“Tabby, I need the table for the evening meal and the chairs are reserved.”
“I also need the table for a sleep and yes, the chair in the corner is reserved for the humans. The others are for me.”
“But you don’t need five chairs Tabby.”
“Who says not. I change my sleeping places regularly. And now do not distrub, I was just at the bit in the dream where the felines take over the world and all humans are our slaves.”
“That’s a nice dream Tabby, I have that one as well. I like the bit where they empty our recycling trays and serve tuna fish.”
“Fluffy, Tabby at the moment we humans are still opening the tins for you, the paw friendly tin opener has not yet been developed.”
“Yes, Mrs. Human, that is the next step. There is a department somewhere in the Kingdom of Bastet where paw friendly tin opener prototypes exist. They have not yet been introduced. Perhaps that was one of the events that Bastet should have organised many years ago.”
Dexter says that is so MY human too. I mean, the table is the perfect place for extended napping.
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especially at lunch time
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Just yesterday, Garry had a similar discussion with the big dog. “Bishop,” he said. “Do NOT drool on the sports section. I am reading it.” Bishop drooled on the sports section. Garry said he was glad it was basketball and he had finished baseball before Bishop dropped by. We all learn to compromise 🙂
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Yes we humans do tend to compromise, but Tabby just told me the word does not exist in meow.
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Dear Tabby and Fluffy, Mindy and I only sleep on the floor, but we are much larger than you are and we need room to stretch out. From time to time (and no one knows why) our human runs the vacuum cleaner over our sleeping places. This makes no sense and it is annoying, but it doesn’t last long. Yours forever and ever, eternally, Dusty T. Dog
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It’s a human thing with the vacuum cleaner, although our sleeping places are usuallly out of reach, just careful feline planning.The days of brooms were much better, the humans we owned even used them to ride on, although if you were a black feline you might run the risk of being a witches assistant.
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