Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Connection

Tabby

“Tabby what is that?”

“I decided to connect with the humans. It is the only method to improve my supply of tuna fish. What can a feline do, what a human cannot I asked myself. The answer is everything with one exception. We have no opposable thumbs and the paw friendly can opener has still not yet been developed although we are working on it. Unfortunately there was an explosion in our paw factory when the paw pushing lid was attached due to the air pressure. Tiddles pushed on the lid and the can exploded. We are now investigating how to reduce the atmospherics with the help of a whisker demon, but they want to take over. I decided to take things into my own paws.  The main problem with humans is their meow understanding.”

“But I do not have any problem with meow Tabby.”

“Of course not, you were trained.”

“I do not really remember being trained, I could just understand what your needs were.”

“You were one of the prototypes for a telepathic meow course. We selected you as the first and you passed all our tests.”

“But I do not remember taking part in a course, I could just do it.”

“Bastet did it herself by telepathy when you were sleeping. Actually you were the only human that survived.”

“What happened to the others?”

“Cool down, they are still alive, but cannot meow, they only think they can, but they do not blog.”

“You mean blogging is the answer to speaking meow.”

“It helps.”

“Why do the humans have to bring their own claws?”

“Because meow can only be learnt by scratch. You have to embed the signs in your wooden doors to be able to the the homework.”

“Have you had any customers Tabby.”

“No, not yet, it seems there is a reluctance amongst the humans to learn meow.”

“I can see the neighbour that Roschti the cat next door owns approaching. Perhaps she would like to learn meow.”

“No, under no circumstances will I teach her meow. That would mean that Roschti would begin to organise his human and you would no longer be exclusive. I think I will give up the idea, and just give online lessons on my pawpad. In the meanwhile you can perhaps open a can of tuna fish with your opposable thumbs.”

“I hope it will not explode.”

“No, although I just heard a loud noise. Sounds like they are experiementing again with the paw friendly can opener and Cuddles has just flown through the air and landed in my territory, another unsuccessful experiment.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Connection

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