Daily Feline Prompt: The Giant Feline

Tabby

“Tabby, that is a very artistic pose – is there a reason?”

“That is not an artistic pose, it is to show my true gigantic dimensions.”

“But I thought you were the smallest in the litter.”

“The others just had a lot of fluff, I had muscles. Of course my brain dimensions compensated for my shorter legs. I was the brains of the family. They all came to me when they wanted to take a jump. I worked it all out measuring tangents by paw and whisker and calculating the trigonometric dimensions.”

“That was very clever Tabby, you must have been very gifted.”

“Oh yes, I was. The others did not even know the importance of the  angle until I explained. If you take a vertical jump downwards from a higher platform you generally land at a 90° angle and from this you can calculate the Sine, Cosine and Tangent of the descent which is important for avoiding unplesant accidents. Of course it ran in my part of the family, from my father who has no longer been seen since that memorable meeting with my mother on a moonlit night. She met many fathers on that night, but mine was the one known as Pythagpawras. He always made neat escapes leaving the ladies wondering if he actually existed. He was a genius and could tell the square on the hypotonuse of a jump at a right triangle by just measuring it by paw.

And now time for dinner Mrs. Human. Please place my tuna fish vertically with the fork into my food bowl with care. Remember the circumference of my bowl which facilitates the matter as you can divide it by π to arrive at the diameter.”

“But we are talking about food and tuna fish Tabby.”

“Yes, but it makes it all the more tasty when you realise the gigantic efforts needed by the brain to digest the formulas. And do not forget to garnish it with a sprig of parsley, you know we eat with the eyes.”

Daily Feline Prompt: The Giant Feline

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