Daily Feline Prompt: The Feline Pawludgeon

New cat in town

“How sweet, look tabby – a little kitten in the garden.”

“Where Mrs. Human? Throw water over it, chase it away, make it clear that it is not welcome.”

“But Tabby it is quite small, probably a new kitten living here. We should welcome it and make it feel at home. Perhaps I should give it some tuna fish.”

“Mrs. Human my tuna fish is mine. We are not a home for lost kittens, and it does not look so lost to me: It is assessing the chances of a take over, planning on moving in on my territory. It needs a pawludgeon to show it its place around here.  If you must play Heinrich Pestalozzi, then give it a bowl of my hard vitamin pellets. Perhaps the kitten might choke on them and then this kitten will be gone forever, back to where it belongs.”

“You are really not very friendly Tabby. I though you would be glad for some company. You could show the kitten the area to make it feel at home.”

“First of all the word company was substituted in the meow vocaabulary many centuries ago with the work “rival”. I do not need company, just a choice of various resting places, a constant filled bowl of food, and my own territory. Kittens that suddenly arrive are to be regarded as being suspicious. Nothing good ever came of a new kitten on the block.”

“But you was once a kitten Tabby.”

“That was different. I did not go looking in strange windows with a “let me in and I will take over” look in my eyes. I fought for my territory, and made an impression on all other felines.”

“You also made an impression on your cat flap beause every time you saw another feline you disappeared through it and stayed here until it was gone.”

“I was just testing Mrs. Human, to see if the at flap was still OK and opening when I wanted it to.”

“But it looks like we really do have a new kitten in the area. It has just disappeared into the neighbours home and also has a cat flap.”

“Big deal, then it can escape when I launch a pawludgeon attack.”

“Tabby do not forget, all kittens become felines one day.”

“If they survive Mrs, Human, if they survive. Hissss, hisss.”

The Feline Pawlugeon

10 thoughts on “Daily Feline Prompt: The Feline Pawludgeon

  1. Dear Tabby, I understand your feelings, but the best day of my adult life was when our human brought my little sister home to live with us. I didn’t think it would be good at first, but now she’s my best friend. But maybe “friend” doesn’t exist in meow? Your Friend forever and ever anyway, Dusty T. Dog

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    • I have discovered my best friends are the onpawline friends, like us. We really get on well together, but at a wonderful distance. I remember when Mrs. Human brought home Fluffy. I disliked him from the beginning, but it was mutual. That is why we got on so well, we both had the same opinion.

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    • We got Tabby together with his litter sister Nera. Nera was always the boss, but Tabby got on well with her. They nevery had a fight, just playful chasing They grew up together. Otherwise Tabby was a loner, always did her own thing. I am sure she missed Nera when she passed on, but after a while Tabby got used to it. She absolutely never missed Fluffy. She was very shy when she joined us, but now no longer. She is the perfect feline for us.

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      • We had a boxer dog when I was very, very young and it died prematurely because of lung cancer (not uncommon in boxers). I was VERY young and when another boxer came along I thought that was my beloved boxer. But my grandma phoned the number the dog carried and the owner kept collecting his dog. I was devastated.

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  2. Oh, and Miss Angloswiss – do not let the little one in! Because if you leave and the cat is used to coming in, you might have a problem onto your return. Either your lovely Tabby has a heart-failure – or the little one, not knowing the whereabouts of the litterbox and in panic when being chased by Tabby would soil your clinically clean floors. So better to keep the cat at bay from early on. You never know if that little cat is up to date with its vaccinations or has fleas or worms, anyway …
    But boy, is that a cute kitty!

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    • No problem there. We had 14 other felines in the neighbourhood once, and they all knew where they belonged. We do not feed other felines or let them in. We have almost 15 years experience with cats now. I also had one in England when I was younger.

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      • Once upon a time we had a Tabby like yours. And one evening my grandm let the tabby cat in that was sitting in front of our door and it came into the kitchen and chewed (vitamine pellets). All was well, unless it turned out, our cat was in the house as well – and that was NOT our cat … 😉

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    • We very rarely have stray cats in our area and nearly all have a collar. Our Tabby has his collar, and needs it because he has a magnet on it to enable her to be able to open her cat flap.

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