Daily Feline Prompt: Crispy Feline

Tabby

“Good Morning Tabby, wide awake and ready to go?”

“I am not going anywhere Mrs. Human, unless of course my food bowl has been refilled.”

“Your food bowl is always full Tabby-”

“It depends on what it is full of.”

“Well at the moment I have a wonderful selection of vitamin packed food pellets, just what the vet perscribed to ensure you remain healthy.”

“I am healthy Mrs. Human, and there is no need for any additional assistance and the vet does not have a clue.”

“You should really eat them Tabby, they are chicken flavoured.”

“Mrs. Human do you like chicken?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Do you enjoy eating the meat from the bones, with its natural flavours.”

“It is all part of the experience Tabby.”

“So what about me? I get no bones, my pellets are only bones. I can be glad if I can bite through them and swallow them and I do not get natural flavours, I only get one flavour, a sort of chemically based “I was once a chicken” taste. Chickens walk on feet with legs, they do not roll around in a dish. I think I am missing something in my life Mrs. Human.”

“But Tabby the vet said …..”

“I don’t care what the vet said, It is all a public relations scheme from the manufacturers of the hard vitiamin pellet manufacturers, telling us they are good for us. The only thing they are good for is producing unique hairballs, a so-called recycling process.”

“Some felines would be happy to have a constant supply of food like you.”

“I am not some feline Mrs. Human. I am the one and only perfect Tabby, with the MacDonalds “M” on my forehead, The feline whose ancestors were worshipped in the old country, and they were not fed on vitamin pellets. They got the real thing with bones, the basic facts of food.”

“But you would have to hunt for your own food Tabby.”

“Oh, I though the humans were trained to do that in the supermarkets.”

“Of course we are, we capture bags of vitamin pellets for you and they are heavy to carry.”

“I will think it over Mrs. Human. In the meanwhile you can open a tin of tuna fish with your opposable thumbs and remember, killing tins of tuna fish would be easier than dragging heavy bags of healthy vitamin pellets home.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Crispy Feline

3 thoughts on “Daily Feline Prompt: Crispy Feline

  1. Dear Tabby, My human is glad you aren’t here. A baby robin landed on the ground yesterday and it was all my human could do to keep my little sister away from it. Actually, though my human didn’t see it, Bear went up and introduced herself to the bird. She’s NOTHING like my Siberian husky sisters/mothers who would have devoured it before the bird had a chance to blink. But it seems all is well (in my human’s opinion) with the bird today. I’m sorry you don’t like your vitamin pellets. I enjoy mine very much. Maybe your human could find a tastier kind? Yours forever and ever, Dusty T. Dog

    Martha here — Tabby, all Dusty has ever eaten are vitamin pellets. He has no idea so don’t listen to him. I’m sure your human buys you the best kind. Yr. Pal, Martha

    Liked by 1 person

    • Meow Dusty
      Vitamin Pellets are vitamin pellets, no matter the flavour or the taste. They are monotonous and really boring. Mrs. Human buys the best kind with the best price as far as she is concerned.
      We only see robins here in Winter, so now I know where they go in summer. I have never tasted one, but I am sure they are an enrichment to the feline taste buds. I doin’t even get sparrows these days, but they seem to be faster than I am now. In my first lives they would not have a chance. Now I am relegated to hoping for bits and pieces from the human table or choking on vitamin pellets. This is no life for a feline. I am neglected, ignored, relegated depending on human care. Where have my days gone when I was worshipped? No Mrs. Human I am not overdoing it. What did you say, tuna fish, I am coming. Take it all back Dustry, where there is tuna fish there is hope.
      Tabby T. Cat

      Liked by 1 person

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