That is not one of my studio portraits, but blame it on Mrs. Human. There I was having a quiet sleep on a chair and suddenly something prods me and says smile. First of all, I do not have the abilitiy to smile, my facial muscles are not programmed for smiles: a snare and a hiss and a threatening gesture yes, but no smile Why should I smile? Felines are only friendly with three people: I, me and myself. Otherwise we are suspicious of anything that lives and breathes. If it does not, there is no problem as it generally will be part of our next meal.
So I am immediately awake, and yawn. This was the first mistake, I yawned too quickly for the camera it seems. Mrs. Human loves to take photos of a yawning Tabby. It is understandable, you can see my wonderful glimmering rows of teeth. The corner teeth are particularly well formed. They are the teeth I use for tearing the meat. After this rude awakening my only wish is to go, disappear and at this moment Mrs. Human takes a photo. Instead of my perfect studio portrait you now have something similar to a “Paws” Picasso image. She even managed to chop off the end of my wonderful tail. She is now working on this photo with photoshop and in the meanwhile I will disappear before she has another human idea for a Pulitzer Prize photo.
Wake me up when my dinner is served.