Feline RDP Sunday: Feline Panoply


Today kittens we are preparing for our life alone in the big wide world. You wil learn to defend your rights and above all to protect your territory.

“Yes Tiddles. How you know it is your territory? Because you have already marked it with your own signs of course.”

“But my mum says marking is not the idea, you just take what you want. You can meow about who the smells belong to afterwards if they are still alive.”

“Your mum seems to have some revolutionary thoughts on possession.”

“She says everything belongs to you, just a matter of having sharp claws.”

“But you are still a kitten Tiddles and can easily lose the battle.”

“My mum said no problem, just call her and she will show who is the boss.”

“And what does you father say.”

“Don’t know, we have a lot of dads living with my mum. She cannot even remember which one is my dad.”

And now just a few points to remember for your future life kittens. “Yes Tiddles, I know, the kittens can always ask your mum if they are not sure. I am  certain she knows all the answers.”

Always sharpen your claws before going anywhere, you never know who might be waiting outside the cat flap. Be prepared and scratch first, ask questions afterwards.

Test your teeth, preferably on a piece of steak, nice and bloody. Bite into it and tear it apart. Tasting blood is always a positive action, it gives you the confidence you need to win the battle.

It is also a good idea to not eat anything before going. You then feel hungry and have more interest in the kill,

If you find a victim have a good sniff first of all to make sure it is the stuff that we felines like to eat. If the smell is right give it a prod and if it moves, then kill it.

Do not forget, if it barks then run in the other direction, you are not yet ready for that. “Yes Tiddles, I am sure your mum has no problems with the ones that bark.”

Feline RDP Sunday: Feline Panoply</a> 

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