Now you see me, now you do not
Here I am in my usual slot
I am always resplendent, no matter what I do
Today I greet you with my customary mew
Now it is Catmas, Santa Feline will be here
Bringing bowls of salmon and other Catmas cheer
I do not ask for gifts, expensive not my goal
Although food is better from a Versace designed bowl
My diamond studied cat flap might be on its way
I have been waiting for many years, much to my dismay
But Santa Feline knows that I am a pefect cat
Water and tuna is ready, and we will have a chat
Meowing my best to all my fans across the feline world, how lucky you are to have me. Wishing all a happy Catmas
Feline RDP Monday: Resplendent Feline</a>
Sleep is harmony, at one with the whiskers
They are my wavelengths connecting with transistors
All I need is a soft place for relaxing on my fur
Close my eyes ignore the world and I begin to purr
One eye half open, always alert, in case there might be food
Being aware is first and foremost, the order of magnitude
A tin opener clanks, I smell fish, and now I am awake
Spring to the food bowl, no time to lose, an edible earthquake
Eat the meal and have a wash, oh dear I feel so tired
I must return to my restful state, the one that is required
It is a hard life that I lead, with obstacles on the way
Harmony is only achieved if I can sleep all day.
Feline RDP Sunday: Feline Harmony
I am a tabby, brown, black and beige
Do not want to be white, that might come with age
Washing all day and part of the night
To keep my fur white, that would be a fright
Being a Tabby means the dirt does not show
And I look so beautiful, I am a feline beau
Just look at this white cat, he has stains on his fur
His feet are full of earth marks, how can a feline purr
We tabby cats are beautiful, the dirt you cannot see
I am content the way I am because I am always me
Feline RDP Saturday: White Feline
“Did you say solstice Mrs. Human?”
“Yes, today is the Winter solstice.”
“Then I have no time, I must hurry.”
“What is the problem Tabby? Where are you going?”
“Do you realise what this means in the life of a feline? It is the most dramatic day of the year.”
“I did not know that the word “solstice” existed in meow.”
“Of course it does. Our world revolves around the solstice and today is the day with the shortest day in the year. And now I have no time to lose.”
“But you are preparing for a sleep, although you have only been awake for an hour.”
“Today is the shortest day in the year, meaning I lose sleeping time. I must now sleep as much as I can to compensate the loss of time. I will have to wait until Summer for the next opportunity to catch up on the sleep loss today. This is a dramatic day in the life of a feline, it is the big sleep day. See you tomorrow Mrs. Human, and please make no unnecessary noise. I must make the most of every spare moment I have for sleeping.”
Feline RDP Friday: Feline Solstice
Whilst I was occupied by killing the leaf soldiers in the Autumn my litter sister Nera was making sure that the bean pods did not take over. When Mr. Human prepared this dangerous vegetable, Nera would keep an eye on them and make sure that they did not escape from the water death. First of all she had a good look to make sure they were resting in water.
No bean escaped her wary eyes. If one moved she would pounce immediately and go for the kill. She knew no fear.
Once she had captured the struggling bean pod she realised that she must be fast and leave the bean no chance of survival.
She trapped it with her paw using the table leg to prevent the bean from escaping. There was no chance of survival for the bean and she would fight until it stopped moving.
Many were the pod battles that Nera fought, but she always won. Mrs. Human did not even thank her for her bravery, but so are the humans. They do not recognise our attempts to keep them safe from the attacking bean pods. Nera sometimes visits me from her 10th life and she is still fighting the beans in the eternal corn chambers.
Feline RDP Thursday: POD
It seems the origins of my family are somewhat uncertain. Of course I had a mum, but the problem was all the dads I had. Every time she went for a walk at a certain time of the month, I would get another half brother or sister and few months later, and mum lost interest in sons and daughters of my generation. Even my litter sister Nera was not exactly a sister, but a half sister. But my adopted brother, Curly, was a different case. Now he knew exactly who his family were. They left nothing to chance. If you are born a Selkirk Rex, then you keep it in the family.
Fluffy is now living his 10th life in the eternal corn chambers, keeping it mouse free, but he would always show off, and even had a photo of his mum and dad, which he left me for the family tree. His family left nothing to chance, His dad, Coolman – on the left, was a Selkirk Rex, and his mum, Lucy – on the right, was also one of them. Naturally Fluffy was a full Selkirk Rex and did he show off about it. He even had papers to prove it, although I never saw them. He just said he had them. And I can tell you that Coolman was father to many. I was not really impressed, being a real Tabby cat, with the Macdonalds “M”, but Fluffy had curls. Although I had to remind him that he never really had whiskers. Every time they grew, they were like corkscrews and a couple of days later they would break: a feline with no whiskers was not a real feline.
I would say family is overrated, we felines live for I, me and myself. As soon as the milk taps dry out, mum gives you a push and gets ready for the next bunch of kittens.
Feline RdP Wednesday: Feline Family
“And did you have a halcyon day today Tabby?”
“Mrs. Human, speak meow that I understand what you are talking about. My day was as perfect as ever. First of all I serenaded you behind a closed bedroom door to ensure that you realise I am also here. When you eventually appeared in my realm, I made sure that your first movements were outside to refill my bowl of water. After absorbing the refreshment I decided to retire to the armchair for an hour’s relaxation and then my taste buds reminded me that it was the time when you refill the vitamin pellets. The only time of the day when they have a fresh taste and not old and stale. Afterwards I was exhausted and again had to spend a few hours recharging my system with some sleep. Afterwards I decided to examine me territory outside and was glad to see that the snow decided to go. This was exhausting, so I had to have yet another relaxing sleep. It seems that when I awoke the sky had changed its colour to something called evening in human terms. Again I felt pains of hunger, and decided to sit and wait for a few tasty morsels from the human food. This time it was worth it, and it rained ham onto the floor. This was again an exhausting experience and so another hour of sleep was called for.
Yes it was eventually a felyon day in all respects.”
“The meow version of Halcyon. Enter it into your human-meow dictionary.”
Feline RDP Monday: Feline Halcyon