Category Archives: Ragtag

Feline RDP Sunday: Feline Persistence

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Tabby

“Tabby, what are you doing?”

“Sleeping Mrs. Human, at least trying to, but now am awake due to the persistence of a human asking silly questions. Today the theme is “persist”. I am persisting in sleep.”

“But you do that every day Tabby.”

“They were just rehearsals, now it is the real thing, so do not disturb.”

“I thought you might like to go for a walk.”

“Definitely not, I am being attacked outside. White hard water has fallen from the sky and it is cold. It persisted throughout the night.”

“That is snow Tabby and now it has stopped.”

“No interest, I will persist with my sleep, so switch the light off when you go.”

Feline RDP Sunday: Feline Persistence

Feline RDP Saturday: Feline Games

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Tabby

The game I play is catch the mouse
If I find one in the house
They seem to avoid me, I do not know why
I am such a kind feline, would never make them cry
Of course they do not enter at free will
Perhaps they realise I only want to kill
If I let them live and begin to play
The other felines would laugh and call me a fay

Feline RDP Saturday: Feline Games

Feline RDP Friday: Feline Overture

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Tabby

The artist has awoken from her dreams, a work lasting at least 4 hours. She is now beginning to sharpen her claws. A new work has been composed and the meows of the overture can alrady be heard. She is preparing to depart, to meet the other musicians. Will they just be howling and hissing, or will there be other instruments. Claws are being sharpened to a point and Tiddles has made the first swipe of the overture, the attack can begin.

Tabby is waiting in the wings for her appearance behind the door flap, but hesitating. Will she appear or not? I believe there was a discussion between her and Mrs. Human, the artist’s manager,  as to the artist’s salary. Tabby is refusing to appear due to a problem concerning vitamin pellets. She will only perform for tuna fish. Tiddles has left the stage and now Tabby is entering, a bowl of tuna fish being prepared. She has won the fight for a correct payment for her performance. She opens her mouth and begins to sing the first notes of the overture. The other felines howl in approval and Mrs. Human is tending to her scratches due to the artist’s wage discussion.

Eventually Roschti, the feline from next door, appears and Tabby decides to finish her performance. There are thunderous meows and paw stampings as she finishes her overture. Roschti is greeted by hisses and hairballs. It is clear who the best performer is.

Feline RDP Friday: Feline Overture

Feline RDP Thursday: Feline Fumble

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Tabby

I found a new place where I can have a fumble
There are objects hanging down, I hope they do not tumble
Mrs. Human said it’s not my place, reserved for her wash
I find it nice and warm and even looks quite posh
I think I will stay a while, although she closed the door
Now I am locked in here, I will have to roar
The door has opened, I am free, I do not like it here
There is the dust eating monster and vitamin pellets to fear

Feline RDP Thursday: Feline Fumble

Feline RDP Wednesday: Feline Coterie

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Nera, Tabby, Mr. Grey and Fluffy

We felines are not actually groupies, but sometimes circumstances take over. For example, I was looking through my kitten album and found this group photo. You can see me on the top left, relaxing in my/our territory. Yes, at that time we had to share our territory, there was no other way, although everyone did their markings in their own space.

At the front on the left is my litter sister Nera. Mum said that she was actually a half sister as on that special evening mum was quite busy. Nera was big and fat, no sorry she always said fluffy, and was the first one to arrive in the litter. We both moved into Mrs. Human’s place and naturally took over although Nera always had the first choice of sleeping place. Nera got her 10th life a few years ago, but still pays a visit now and again, in a higher dimension of time and space of course.

And on the right we have Fluffy. I do not really know why he joined us, but I think it was a human thing. Fluffy had curls and was not really my sort of feline. He even knew who his mum and dad were. I think it was an arranged marriage. Fluffy was one of those male felines, although I think he was about as male as I was female, you know the never to be forgotten visit to the vet that we all had. I don’t think that Fluffy ever got a chance to realise that he was a male cat. And so there we were, although Nera and I had to show Fluffy who the boss was with a paw swipe now and again. We soon got him trained.

If you are wondering about the fourth feline at the back, that is Mr. Grey. He did not belong to us really, but lived next door, but he was OK. He had his own territory and Nera said to leave him to do his own thing, so we did.

Of course it was all in our younger years. Fluffy is also now living her 10th life with Nera, and I do not know what happened to Mr. Grey. I think his human moved and he decided to go with her. I never saw him again, but he was not really family.

They were the good old days, and now it is all I, me and myself which is also quite good. Who needs friends, as long as you have food.

Feline RDP Wednesday: Feline Coterie

Feline RDP Tuesday: Feline Connection

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Tabby

Shhh
I am connecting, so please do not disturb
My sleeping system is delicate, although it is superb
First of all I find a place where I can rest my body
Somewhere soft to suit my fur and above all not too shoddy
Then I test the stability and turn three times around
If it fits, and I get the feeling, I will sink to the ground
I close my eyes and then I sleep, but my third eye is alert
Now to concentrate on the dreams, and nothing must divert
The process is very intensive, I need at least ten hours
to connect with the other dimension, and maintain my super powers

Feline RDP Tuesday: Feline Connection

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Ripple

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Tabby

“Tabby, why do you put your paw in your water bowl?”

“That’s obvious Mrs. Human, I have to stop them.”

“Stop what?”

“The ripples of course. The water moves when I take a drink and I must make sure that it stays where it is. It could take over and I might drown.”

“But Tabby it is only a bowl of water, not a lake or a river.”

“But where do the lakes and rivers begin Mrs. Human It all starts with water falling from the sky. Suddenly we have a puddle and my paws are covered with water. I must stop this water invasion. If I put my paw in my water it keeps the water where it is and it no longer rises.  I cannot swim Mrs. Human, it could cover me completely and I would drown.”

“You will not drown in a bowl of water Tabby. it needs more.”

“And who says that the water will not expand and increase. Better to be safe than sorry and so I stop it from taking over. What are you doing Mrs. Human?”

“I emptied the water and now there is no danger of being covered by the water.”

“But, Mrs. Human, I was enjoying a drink of the water.”

“I thought you was worried that it would drown you.”

“Of course not, there is only enough water in the bowl to cover my paw.”

“Oh, I thought you were frightened of being submerged.”

“Of course not, I was just having a scientific conversation. Silly humans, as if we could drown in a bowl of water.”

“Oh, sorry Tabby, how stupid of me. I only wanted to save your life.”

“The question is which life.”

“No Tabby I will not get involved in a discussion about the nine lives of a feline.”

“Ok, Mrs. Human, then replace the water in my bowl that I can continue having a drink.”

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Ripple