Daily Feline Prompt: Lost Feline

Tabby

I never get lost, but I am a cat, I always find the way home
Just a twitch of the whiskers and a shiver of the tail warns me not to roam
I do it by smell, I cannot explain, but my nose sniffs the way to go
I take a straight path one paw after the other and the wind begins to blow
I smell the scent of the place where I live, even if I am far away
I know where I belong, where my food is waiting, and have no intention to stray
Have you ever seen a feline that is lost, the word exists not in meow
It is known as instinct for the unknowing humans, but they do not have the know-how
It exists in our bones, in our brain in our heart to find our dearest wish
But the best way to find us is filling our bowl with a portion of tuna fish

Daily Feline Prompt: Lost Feline

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Detonations

Tabby

There is nothing like a cooling drink of water when you have survived a stress situation. I had spent a few hours in one of my resting places. I was relaxed, had a wash and then was confronted with the next problem. Where shall I sleep now? I had already occupied the cushion at the top of the cupboard and Mrs. Human’s bed covers still had the dent where I had spent a restful two hours of sleep. I was bewildered, and knew I had to find a new place to sleep. Using the same places twice on the same day is not good for the balance of the feline vegitative nerve system.

There is only one cure for this problem: a drink of fresh water from the bowl, but there again which bowl? I decided on the bowl outside, as  I had already tasted the water in my dining corner. Inside water can be very boring, as it usually comes from this thing called “tap”, mixed with all sorts of chemicals as it is “good for you”. I discovered some time ago that the human phrase “good for you” has nothing to do with the feline ideas of well being. Although the water outside is also from this tap thing, it matures in the fresh air. It can absorb various aromas, even particles contained in the air. If it has rained in the meanwhile, this is a great improvement, adding various textures to the water. Today it did not rain, but the sun is shining and its ultra violet rays infiltrate the feline taste buds – this is strictly feline, humans have no idea what the are missing.

Note the placing of my right front paw in the bowl. This adds to the flavours from where my paw has trod. This is a special paw, and when placed in the water bowl, detonates an explosion of flavours. And now to sleep. I can see the shade of a tree inviting me for a further few hours of sleep. Three different sleeping places in six hours, this is feline ecstasy.

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Detonations

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Acceptance

Untitled

I just realised that my birthday will be in a couple of weeks time, on 2nd April, just saying. If you are preparing gifts for my birthday then you can contact Mrs. Human. She will be dealing with all the preparations for my party.

It is also the time that I renew her contract. She has been a member of my staff for many years, since 2002, and she has learned well. At the beginning there were learning difficulties. She made it clear that I was not welcome in her bedroom or on her bed, the door was constantly closed. However, after a few pawing sessions on the door and entering the room every time she opened the door and making myself comfortable, she soon gave up and now I often have a sleep on her bed during the day. She did insult me by placing a cover on the bed, muttering something about not wanting feline fur all over the bed, but I ignored it. Now we get on perfectly well together. I sleep where I want to and she makes sure I am comfortable.

When I was younger, I often took long walks in my territory. I did not ask her to come and look for me as I was perfectly capable in finding my own way home, but she would insist following my path to find me. Once I was really having fun, forgot the time, as I had discovered a complete city of mice below ground level. Time flew, and suddenly she was there. She was very concerned and worried that I was lost. Felines do not get lost, we do our own thing.

The food is quite good, always a full bowl, although the basic menu is not really my taste. Of course I can digest the wonderful, healthy vitamin pellets, but I am working on that one with some paw persuasion for tuna fish first. I think I am getting somewhere because I noticed when she returned from her shopping trip today, she had bought 4 tins of tuna fish, although the small tins. She find too much tuna fish at once is not healthy, but she did not ask me and “healthy” does not exist in meow.

I think I will renew the contract for another year. To be quite honest I have not found any other human that wants the job (but don’t tell her).

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Acceptance

Daily Feline Prompt: Uneven Feline Prompt

Tabby

“Mrs. Human, Help, I am being attacked.”

“By a feline, or a dog.”

“No of course not, felines are predictable. Another feline makes a hiss as a warning and pawswipe and that is no problem as long as there is a cat flap near for a quick retreat. A dog can be more of a problem, as they are unpredictable, you never know what they are thinking – you might be a good meal, and they start licking you all over your fur. Again if there is a cat flap nearbye, there is always an escape route.”

“So what is the problem?”

“The snow has returned and it is dropping from the sky. It has attcked me.”

“Where, I cannot see any injuries.”

“Look on my fur, it is sticking to my fur and probably thinking out the best plan of attack.”

“Tabby, snow cannot think, it is not alive.”

“Of course it is alive. It moves, it drops from the sky and it is planning to destroy all life of earth. When you go out in the snow, you protect your head with a hat and strong shoes. Even a human must be careful with the snow.”

“Of course Tabby. If it is cold outside it can freeze and you can slip, so I have to protect my feet with boots.”

“And me. I only have my paws, I could get pawbite from the cold and I can also slip.”

“But you have claws to grip on the ice and I have no claws.”

“Another imperfection of the human race. Look at my fur, the snow is already arriving on my head. I am in danger.”

“Then come inside instead of hovering at the window.”

“At last, look it has disappeared from my head, I won the battle. No matter what you say, snow is a living thing. It changes its shape. This morning it was tiny drops, and now it is a mega size, enormous, it could knock me unconscious.”

“Do not exaggerate Tabby.”

“Where has the snow gone, is it hiding?”

“No Tabby it has melted.”

“But look over there, there is a man made out of the snow, I am sure it is the leader of the snow army.”

“That is a snowman Tabby, the children made him with their hands.”

“Oh, are there snow cats as well?”

“There might be, perhaps the children might make a snow cat if you ask them.”

“Forget it – where is my tuna fish?”

Daily Feline Prompt: Uneven Feline Prompt

Daily Feline Prompt: Infinite Feline Possibilities

Tabby

“Going Out Tabby?”

“Just don’t rush me Mrs. Human, I am thinking about it.”

“You are a grumpy feline today Tabby.”

“I am not grumpy, I am feeling fine. I cannot just go out,  as there are many aspects to take into consideration.”

“Such as?”

“Is the snow still there?”

“Yes Tabby, it is. It will only go away when the weather is warmer, then it will melt.”

“Melt? does that mean I can drink it?2

“I suppose you could, but you always have fresh water in your bowl.”

“That is not the same thing. Melted snow water might be something special, a grand cru of all water vintages. Mrs. Human, if it begins to melt then put some in my bowl, I must try it.”

“No problem Tabby, so now you are going out?”

“I think I will, life is so boring when couped up indoors. Make the way free, I will risk it, but do not leave me on my own out there. Snow can be a dangrous thing for a defenceless feline.”

Tabby

“Are you going or not Tabby. It is cold with the window open.”

“I am still thinking about it. There is a monster outside, it is not safe. Look at those gigantic footprints, they have an infinite size.”

“They do not have an infinite size, they are my foot prints, because I happened to tread on the snow.”

“And you survived?”

“Of couse I survived, it is only a few centimeters deep, and no problem to walk on.”

Tabby

“Look Mrs. Human, I did it. I walk on the snow. I forced it to surrender.”

“You mean it attacked you.”

“I did not give it a chance for an attack. Look at the injuries on the snow.”

“That is the imprint of your paws in the snow. Snow is not a living thing Tabby.”

“Of course not, I killed it.”

“Where are you going?”

“I am returning, after a sucessful fight, to heal my wounds.”

“You are wounded?”

“I have cold paws from the battle and want to warm them up. It is time for food in any case.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Infinite Feline Possibilities

Daily Feline Prompt: Don’t touch my whiskers

Tabby

“Mrs. Human, I don’t remember being asked to give my specific permission to put that photo on my blog site.”

“But Tabby I was sure it would be OK.”

“You cannot just shoot photos of me because you are sure it is OK. It is not OK. I like to pose for the photos that everyone sees, showing my perfection. This is a side view, and my profile is not always best from the right side. I have less whiskers on that side.”

“I did not realise that it was so important.”

“Meaning that photo will do for a Tabby blog. My Blogs are sacred, they show the essence of being feline. You cannot just do a feline selfie of me and think that will do.”

“But it is not very often that you actually pose for a photo Tabby. You never look at the camera and I found your profile is very intersting.”

“Oh, you think so. Yes I suppose I do look rather pensive and studious. Ok, I will let it go this time, but in future ask. I did not even have time for a lick before you took the photo, my fur behind the ears is not as well-groomed as usual. I had just awoken from my beauty sleep and had no time for a grooming session. What will my fans think of me?”

“You have fans?”

“Of course, I examine my blog statistics daily and every day there are more, so I cannot afford to disappoint them. We could have a portrait session later. I will first of all have a restful sleep and afterwards a fur lick. Perhaps I could have my fur balls in the photo as well, that would make an impression on my followers”

“Yes Tabby, it definately would, but it might not be a good impression. We do not want to make the fans jealous of your wonderful fur balls. Not every feline produces such perfect fur balls.”

“That’s true. OK, just a plain portrait from the front and the left side. I will just have to manicure my claws first of all.”

“But no-one will see your claws Tabby.”

“Of coure not, but it is the internal values that are important.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Don’t touch my whiskers”

Daily Prompt: The Feline pungent test

Tabby

“What’s that?”

“It is a piece of Mr. Human’s lemon tart. I must have dropped it.”

“What do you do with it? Can you kill it and eat it?”

“It never lived Tabby, so you cannot kill it and I don’t think that felines eat it.”

“You eat food that you cannot kill Mrs. Human – another strange feature of the human anatomy. If you want to eat something you must ensure that it no longer moves or breathes. How can you eat something that does neither, that must be a strange example of food. It is not even moving, dead before it even had a chance. What is its history?”

“It does not have a history Tabby, Mr. Human made it.”

“He creates dead things?”

“No Tabby, he makes them with various ingredients like eggs, milk and sugar with lemon juice.”

“There you have it, he is an alchemist.  I will have to correct the quote from the great feline scientist Paws Paracelsus to state that  “Medicine rests upon four pillars – philosophy, astronomy, alchemy, and Mr. Human’s lemon tart”.

“Not quite Tabby, he had the recipe from me.”

“Then you created life from dead matter in the form of a lemon tart orginally.”

“I did not create any sort of life, because it was all dead in the first place.”

“Which all reverts to the old feline philosopy of a discussion about what came first: the kitten or the feline.”

“No Tabby, you are confusing something with your feline sense of wisdom”

“Felines do not confuse, we organise. In any case I do not like that lemon tart, it is dead, has no interest for me. It does not even want to be killed. Now I have to sleep and poinder on the origin of the feline species and the lemon tart. I don’t think I will eat it in any case, it has a rather pungent smell.”

“Yes, Tabby, a good idea, this conversation is getting just a little too complicated for a mere human like me.”

Daily Prompt: The Feline pungent test