Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Harmony

Tabby

“Tabby, I think we will leave your daily blog for today.”

“But all my fans will be disappointed, they only switch on their computers to see what wise words I have to paw.”

“But the subject is “Harmony” Tabby.”

“Are you insinuiating that I am not harmonious Mrs. Human. I am the most harmonius feline you could meet. Did you have any problems with me today.”

“Of course not Tabby, but you slept all morning for six hours.”

“I did? Yes times goes so fast when you are enjoying yourself. Did anything happen whilst I was sleeping.”

“No, Tabby, everything is the same as ever.”

“But something happened. Look at my territory. I was just about to find a nice comfortable place to sleep and it is full of disturbing objects.”

“Tabby, they really do not disurb, you still have a nice piece of grass in your territory where you can rest.”

“But it is not harmonious. It disturbs the balance of my meditative moments. How can I close my eyes and drift into the feline sunset when there are objects everywhere interrupting the balance of my feline scenery. Remove them Mrs. Human.”

“Sorry Tabby, not possible. They belong to the construction workers and they will only  be removed when they have finished the job.”

“I think I must have a word with these construction workers. Are they owned by felines?”

“I really do not know Tabby, I did not ask them.”

“Well ask them the next time they arrive. I can then take up contact with their felines and use my influence to stop these anti harmonious actions that are distrubing the peace of my feline life.  Oh my nerves, Mrs. Human, what I have to withstand in this world organised by humans. I will be glad to achieve my 10th life, at least there will be no human disharmony. We felines let you take over and this is the result.”

“Oh, poor Tabby. Is there anthing I can do to help.”

“Yes there is, the only cure for chaos is a well temepered bowl of tuna fish, garnished with tarragon to enhance the taste and afterwards a sleep to rest my tired and confused body.”

“Yes, Tabby, of course, but you only just awoke from a sleep.”

“Mrs. Human sleep is harmony for us felines.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Harmony

Daily Feline Prompt: Spikey Feline

Tabby

“Mrs. Human, what are those spiky things doing on my territory.”

“The builders put them there Tabby.”

“But they did not ask my permission.”

“They do not have to ask for permission. They have work to do. They will be making our home nicer, with lots of new things to make it stronger.”

“But I do not remember that they asked for my permission. I do not like spiky things on my lawn, my territory. How can I stretch full length with an obstacle in my way.”

“Do not worry Tabby, it will not be there for long. They will soon encase the complete building in this metal pieces and even equip them with stairs and platforms.”

“Great, then it will be an extension to my territory.”

“Not exactly Tabby. You must be careful, I had to rescue Roschti yesterday as he got trapped on one of the platforms and did not know how to return.”

“Obviously Mrs. Human. The Roschti tribe as not as advanced as the Tabby “MacDonalds “M” on the forehead” tribe. They only learned to climb up but did not bother to learn how to return. Did he hurt himself?”

“No, Tabby, I helped him to find the way back.”

“Mrs. Human, that is known as fraternising with the enemy. The next time let him find his own way back.”

“But Tabby he could have had an accident if he had fallen.”

“Not my problem. His own fault for climbing in places where he shouldn’t climb.”

“But that could happen to you as well Tabby.”

“No chance, I am far too intelligent to make such a stupid mistake. Did you take a photo of him stranded on the scaffolding? I could use it on my Pawbook page as one of those jokes.”

“Yes, Tabby I took his photo, but not as a joke, but to show you how dangerous it can be.”

“Only dangerous for stupid felines like Roschti. So let’s put the photo on my blog a a warning to all stupid felines that they should not climb everywhere.”

Roschti

Daily Feline Prompt: Spikey Feline

Daily Feline Prompt: Frying Felines

Tabby

I do not like to fry and I am very sly
I hide in the shade, for heat I am not made
I do not need the sun, it is not very much fun
We felines are cool, we do not play the fool
Give me a place  that has some grace
I do not like hot, I prefer a cool spot
My food I like raw, it is better for my jaw
Mrs. Human likes to cook, by hook or by crook
I prefer natural taste, it is more feline based
We live to eat, our life is a treat
Fresh kill is best, from those living in a nest
But please do not weep, it’s instinct, now to sleep
Will be back tomorrow, and will feel no sorrow
Same time and same place, so is the feline race

Daily Feline Prompt: frying Felines

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Chuckle

Tabby

“Tabby, you are sleeping your life away.”

“Which one, Mrs. Human, I have nine, or had nine altogether. I think there are now 5 of them left. And there is nothing to stay awake for at the moment. It is snowing outside, the builders have removed my freedom of movement outside, by putting iron bars in front of the window. Life is not exactly full of chuckles at the moment, although physically I would not be able to chuckle.”

“But you should really be more active. Sleeping is not so good.”

“I find sleeping very good Mrs. Human. It gives me time to think about things. In the words of the great feline poet William Paws Blake “Think in the morning. Act in the noon. Eat in the evening. Sleep in the night”.”

“Yes Tabby, but you sleep all day and have no time for the other actions.”

“Of course I do. It is all multi tasking. When I sleep I am thinking, acting and planning on what to eat when I am awake. It is all a question of organisation. So now stop disturbing my sleep, I had just got the the part  about the eating. I was walking across a field and tuna fish were darting around my feet. Now and again I would trap one in my claws and eat it.”

“But this evening it is the delicious vitamin pellets.”

“Yes, well every feline has its meowmares now and again.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Chuckle

Daily Feline Prompt: The Opaque Feline

Tabby 17.04 (4)

“Tabby do you want to come in?”

“No of course not Mrs. Human, I am just sitting out here in the freezing cold for the benefit of my feline health, admiring the view of the warm inside of my home. Of course I want to come it, you do ask some silly questions. And perhaps you could clean the windows, they are quite opaque.”

“Sorry Tabby, I did not see you straight away. I cleaned the windows last week so they should be clean.”

“Yes, well now the have paw marks on them.”

“Oh yes, I see them, you should perhaps be more careful about dragging your paws over my windows. They tend to leave marks on the glass afterwards.

“Mrs. Human, if you had attended to my needs immediately, instead of leaving me outside in the cold, I would not have needed to swipe my paws over the window to attract your attention, although you continued to ignore me. What were you doing that was more important than me?”

“I had bought a new bag of those healthy vitamin pellets this morning and was opening it for you.”

“A new bag, you mean I had forced my way through the complete 5 Kg of indigestible pellets in the other bag. At least there is a positive side to it all.”

“Which is Tabby?”

“Vitamin Pellets contain attractant to encourage unknown stupid felines to actually eat those pellets. When the bag is fresh, even I fall into the trap, thinking that I am getting real tuna fish. After a few days, however, this attractant lure of smell and taste has disintegrated and it is only the stupid felines, whose ancesters were not worshipped as gods like mine, that still think they are getting something good and tasty.”

“Where did you find all of that information Tabby.”

“I Catoogled it on my pawpad and found it in Catapedia.There is even an article about the vitamin pellet fake news in Pawbook.”

“You felines seem to be very well organised on line.”

“Of course we are, And don’t forget the windows Mrs. Human. If it is anything I dislike it glass with pawmarks.”

Daily Feline Prompt: The Opaque Feline

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Jolt

Tabby

“Already coming home Tabby?”

“Why did you want to get rid of  me Mrs. Human? The window was open so I made a bolt for freedom before some stupid human decided to close it.”

“Of course I don’t want to get rid of you. We all love you here.”

“Love? Does not exist in meow, although perhaps I could try it out. Does it taste good.”

“No Tabby, it is not something to eat, it is a feeling you have when you find someone is sort of unreplaceable and means something to you.”

“Ah, I see, like tuna fish.”

“No, Tabby, we are talking about feelings.”

“Feelings? This is getting more complicated. Of course tuna fish is not unreplaceable, you can always fill up my bowl when it is empty. Vitamin pellets are also not unreplaceable because you constantly give them to me. I do not love vitamin pellets. See, I can use that word as well.”

“But that is in a negative sense.”

“Then why do you love me Mrs. Human.”

“Because you are Tabby, with all your faults and likeable characteristics.”

“I do not have faults.”

“Everyone has faults Tabby, that is normal.”

“Are faults a human thing.”

“Yes, of course.”

“You see that is why we felines have no faults. We are so perfect. Mrs. Human, where is the tuna fish? I love tuna fish – look I am getting the hang of it. I love me, I love my wonderful fur with the Macdonald’s “M” on the forehead and above all…”

“Yes, Tabby.”

“I love sleeping.”

“Oh, I though you might say that you love me.”

“No Mrs. Human, that does not work. It is a human thing, so humans have to love me and I will let you love me. Loving humans is not a feline thing.”

“Perhaps loving other felines?”

“Forget it, our relationship is based on not loving each other.”

“But your mother and father must have loved each other.”

“They only met for a few minutes and mum said it was no big deal. She gave him a paw swipe when they parted, so I don’t think love has much to do with it in the feline sense of the word. It was more maintenence of the species according to mum, and she maintained quite a few.”

“Ok, Tabby, then let’s forget the whole thing, it is getting too complicated.”

“You mean you don’t love me? OK, don’t bother to answer that one.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Jolt

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Climbing

Tabby

Now I don’t mind telling you, that things around here are not what they used to be. I had a nice comfortable regular life, as would befit my existence. My ancestors were worsipped as gods, which was rightly so, and now  my regal condition as been reduced to climbing over a ditch to get to my own property.

It all began some time last week. I was just settling into a comfortable sleep, as is my custom just after dawn and there was a noise in front of my window. My window, the place that should always be quiet and settled. There were men that began to make noises. Even a human voice with its coarse booming tones is a disturbance, but they had machines as well. They do not even make ear plugs for felines, which I should look into, as this noise continued for a complete week. Luckily my dining room was on the other side of my living quarters. Mrs. Human said something about this state of affairs continuing for the next 6-7 months. No-one asked me, again I had been ignored.

When this interruption to my life was finished the workmen departed and left a ditch, a deep ditch. I was now forced to jump into it to leave my premises and climb to arrive in my territory. What a humiliation, although the feline next door told me it had happened to his territory as well. War has broken out, and we felines must defend ourselves from these irrational attacks, but Mrs. Human said everything would return to it normal state in 6-7 months. We felines do not live with months, but lives, and I am hoping, keeping claws and paws crossed, that I will not use up my ninth life, before this distrubance is finished.

I noticed that the workmen have left me with a platform to cross the gap between my territory and home. I also noticed that the feline next door does not have such a platform, so at least they respected my higher status. I am not used to looking up at things, but looking down on everything, due to my higher situation in feline life. In the meanwhile I have to put up with this humiliation, but I will return. It is cats first after all.

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Climbing