Feline RDP Sunday: Feline Mentor

Tabby

“Come down from that wall Tabby, before you have an accident.”

“No problem, Mrs. Human, my wall will protect me.”

“Because of the wall you might fall.”

“Never, the wall is my mentor.”

“Walls are not mentors. A mentor is someone that will advise you. Just as I am advising you to come down from the wall.”

“No way. A mentor is also someone that will train me to do the right thing, and you have never trained me to do anything. Humans only have two paws and fur on their heads, so are incomplete. I must admit you have opposing thumbs, but that is necessary to open the tins of tuna fish. We cannot be expected to do everything. But a wall is my mentor, he gives me an example of standing firm: the wall is my protection and inspires me to achieve untold heights.”

“Tabby, the only untold heights it inspires is to make you jump from the wall.”

“Wrong Mrs. Human. First of all I feel the way with my paw and then gracefully descend. There is no jumping. My wall is my advisor and gave me exact instructions. It said “trust me, I will show you the way”.”

“Tabby walls do not talk.”

“Wrong Mrs. Human, the wall talks to me. He is at this moment telling me not to heed the words of an ignorant human, that has no wall appreciation, a non-believer.”

“If your wall is so clever, why can I not hear its wise words.”

“Obvious Mrs. Human, because you are not able to use telepathy. I think you had the wrong mentors in your life. Your mentors told you that telepathy does not exist and so you believed them. They told you that walls do not have feelings. Humans are really unjust in their treatment of walls. And now please leave me. I have to calm my wall down, you have caused it to get excited and it is disappointed that no-one trusts a wall. “There there wall, stop crying, Mrs. Human does not meant it.” See what you have done my wall is now wet.”

“Stay cool Tabby, that is because it is raining.”

“Another weak excuse, why do humans not recognise the importance of wall psychology.”

Feline RDP Sunday: Feline Mentor

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Mentor

Tabby

Mentor? An experienced and trusted feline. That is me, I am experienced and trust myself. There is no-one that is more experienced than me. Of course there is my wall. The wall and I have a common denominator. The wall knows everything. I can stare at the wall all day and the wall stares back – what could be better?

My wall is a special wall. Last year Mrs. Human even had it freshly painted, for me of course. There were humans occupied all day putting paint on my wall. She even put plants in front of it to make it look better. Yes I am her mentor, what I meow, she does without hesitation. She believes in me of course. She recognises my wisdom, follows my advice, almost. There is still a disagreement about the hard, tasteless vitamin pellets but one day I will conquer this problem and she will believe.

Now you can see me looking at my wall and the wall is looking at me. I know it is a mystery for humans to encipher our purpose in wall watching, but we are not just watching. We are conversing, exchanging our thoughts and transcendentally meditating on the meaning of life and walls.

Only today the sun’s rays illuminated my wall. The rays rebounded off the wall, sent a signal and I came running. My wall was lonely, and the sun woke her up. The wall needed companionship, someone to stare at, and I arruived to tend to the needs of the wall. We are many felines that adopt our own walls. Walls need followers, they give us a purpose in life. Never ask what you wall can do for you, but what you can do for your wall. Have you noticed dogs never have their own walls. Yes, well that is obvious, they would not show as much respect for a wall as we felines.

Daily Feline Prompt: Feline Mentor