The artist has awoken from her dreams, a work lasting at least 4 hours. She is now beginning to sharpen her claws. A new work has been composed and the meows of the overture can alrady be heard. She is preparing to depart, to meet the other musicians. Will they just be howling and hissing, or will there be other instruments. Claws are being sharpened to a point and Tiddles has made the first swipe of the overture, the attack can begin.
Tabby is waiting in the wings for her appearance behind the door flap, but hesitating. Will she appear or not? I believe there was a discussion between her and Mrs. Human, the artist’s manager, as to the artist’s salary. Tabby is refusing to appear due to a problem concerning vitamin pellets. She will only perform for tuna fish. Tiddles has left the stage and now Tabby is entering, a bowl of tuna fish being prepared. She has won the fight for a correct payment for her performance. She opens her mouth and begins to sing the first notes of the overture. The other felines howl in approval and Mrs. Human is tending to her scratches due to the artist’s wage discussion.
Eventually Roschti, the feline from next door, appears and Tabby decides to finish her performance. There are thunderous meows and paw stampings as she finishes her overture. Roschti is greeted by hisses and hairballs. It is clear who the best performer is.
Feline RDP Friday: Feline Overture
I do not build, that is not my work
It’s Mrs. Human’s job, I am not a jerk
I am far too busy with washing and sleeping
she has more time than me, fulfilled with the sweeping
She often complains that my tray makes a mess
I like to cover my recycled goods and she says it is a stress
Of course I am busy with many other calls
I have to create things and build my own hair balls
And now I must sleep, my wash is nearly done
I have no time for work, Mrs. Human has the fun
Feline RDP Friday: Feline Build
It’s cold outside, I will stay indoors
I am not going out and crawling on all fours
My paws will get wet, my claws begin to freeze
Icicles hanging everywhere, even in the trees
I have to be careful to keep my whiskers dry
They could break when frozen and then they say goodbye
Feline RDP Friday: Frosty Feline
Me, shopping, forget it. I have a human for such menial tasks. She brings my my tuna fish regularly, so what more could a feline want. Perhaps opposable thumbs to open the tins, although she does it usually with no problem. Of course she does run a little wild now and again and brings home a bag of vitamin pellets, but as long as she has the tuna fish tins somewhere in the bag, there is no problem.
We felines do our shopping outside. It is almost self service. If it lives and breathes then kill it and eat it We do not beat about the paw, we pounce. As time goes on, I do not bother so much. I let the birds do their own thing, and chewing on all those bones exhausts my teeth somewhat. Mrs. Human says I am getting older, but so is she of course. As long as she does some pre chewing on the bits and pieces she drops for me from the table, I do not mind.
In the evening she sits down to her meal. No vitamin pellets of course: the real thing. I sit patiently waiting and watching and then she gets a guilty feeling. It is then that I am suddenly confronted with a choice of ham, even roast beef. The good evenings are when Mr. Human also joins in. I am then confronted with a choice of delicacies. Yes, my human training programme has worked. Who needs to go shopping when life in my realm is a self service shop.
Feline RDP Friday: Feline Shopping
Snooze? Of course. The best way to pass time. It’s a way of one of the cat’s nine lives, if you still have nine. I lost a few on the way unfortunately, that is why I am still snoozing. I must conserve my energy for greater deeds, like preparing for a snooze. There is nothing better and I never ever have sleepless nights or days. Insomnia does not exist in meow.
Of course, I am not completely on the other side, you never know if there is danger lurking in the background, although I organised Mrs. Human to make sure that I am not disturbed. She also snoozes now and again and so I join her. Snoozing together is much more fun.
As the famous feline Purrs William Blakecat said “Think in the morning. Act in the noon. Eat in the evening. and sleep in between”. We all know that a wakeful moment is a wasted moment. So cats and kittens remember: snooze when you can, it is the essence of life and do not forget to have a good lick before and afterwards to refresh yourself for the next snooze. Food? of course but only when you are not snoozing.
These are the wise words of a feline that has experience.
Feline RDP Friday: Feline Snooze
I can jump
I can fall
I am the best
I can do it all
I climb walls
I dig holes
I am so clever
I achieve all goals
I read minds
I am great
I had nine lives
Now five, that is fate
There is so much
that I know how
I am a genius
Let’s have a big meow
Feline RDP Friday: Feline Skill
This is my Friday sleep in my comfortable chair, I have been here since this morning. I also have the same sleep the other six days of the week. You see what a boring life I lead. Now and again I shift to another chair to break up the monotony and even Mrs. Human’s bed, but today is Friday, so I chose my Friday chair again. I also slept here last night, in preparation for today’s sleep. Friday sleeping sessions do tend to repeat themselves.
Basically we felines have no Fridays, our calendar does not really have days. The elders in the years gone past tried it, but it did not work. The felines slept and did not know how long they had been sleeping which meant there was confusion about the day when they were again awake. so we decided to abolish the idea. Now we just sleep when the urge takes us which is quite often
Of course there is an eating and washing break, but that is also not a Friday duty, but just when we feel like it. There are tuna fish days now and again, but every day seems to be a vitamin pellet day. Yes, it is a monotonous life being a feline, and now I have another important task. I must change my sleeping position from North to South to East to West to break the monotony. My whiskers are my compass, that is their purpose.
Feline RDP Friday: Feline Friday