Feline RDP Monday: Bold Feline

Tabby

Of course I am bold
I am the bravest cat alive
I have fear of nothing
On danger I can thrive
Of course I am careful
And sharpen up my claws
I only venture outside
carefully on all paws
If I am in my territory
and there is another cat
He might hiss and want to fight
He does not want to chat
I now have a choice
Shall I pounce,
push him to the floor
I am a pacifist,
and leave through my door
There is no point of bloodshed
Because it might be mine
And so I turn away from trouble
He might begin to whine
Being bold is one thing
Being brave as well
I prefer to run away
He might start to yell

Feline RDP Monday: Bold Feline

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Spray

Tabby

I am a lady, and I really do not spray
There are more discrete methods of marking on my way
Tom cats are professionals with spraying all around
They are the real professionals and spray without a sound
I pause on the path and I might just let is go
But no-one notices it, my own private show
I like to mark my territory to prove that it is mine
But I would need opposing thumbs if I would write a sign
And so I just squat when no-one else is there
The other felines realise this and then they are aware
My home is my castle, scent lingers it’s a fact
Even Mrs. Human smells of me, although she is no cat

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Spray

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Speculation

Tabby

And as the intrepid feline paws her way
She is thinking shall I go, or shall I stay
Inside it is warm with a comfortable bed
A nice soft cushion to rest a weary head
Outside the wind is blowing, the whiskers freeze
It is a storm warning and not just a breeze
Adventure is waiting for the cat that dares to go
Tabby walks undaunted her pace is getting slow
She hears the sound of thunder and sees another cat
Lives can be so dangerous, but she is an aristocat
Should she leave her territory and fall into a trap
Tabby now has second thoughts and returns by her cat flap

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Speculation

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Key

Tabby

Who needs a key when I have four paws
I can open any door, not difficult, because
I can scrape at the wood and my human can hear
Although she can be sleeping and does not appear
I then meow louder, and now she is awake
But she still decides to neglect me, a typical mistake
And so I turn up the volume, the noise she cannot ignore
I push and I scratch, and then she opens the door
But now I am exhausted and my feelings are deep
I decided to give up and collapsed in a sleep
The solution to this problem is very plain to see
Give your felines an opposable thumbed door key

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Key

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Flare

Tabby

Now and again I like to have a flare
It exercises the lungs and fills me with air
I am not really angry, but like to let off steam
I might even hiss and perhaps a meowing scream
And now I am fit and am top of the world
My teeth are nice and sharp and the whiskers are curled
This exhausting exercise pulls me asunder
So now is time to eat as it encourages the hunger
It seems that my new diet calls for bowls of meat
And sometimes a there is tuna fish which is my deserved treat
So let us have flare up and enjoy the feline life
My teeth are ready and cut through it like a knife

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Flare

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Skedaddle

Tabby

I am not skedaddling anywhere, I am too tired. Have just spent half an hour washing and preparing for a sleep. On the other paw, things are changing around here. Suddenly I get a bowl of tuna fish every evening. I do not manage to eat it all at once, but Mrs. Human leaves it for me and later I eat the rest. Afterwards she gives me my vitamin pellets, but somehow they are different. They have more “oomph” that the others, are smaller and their shape is different. This has all happened since I visited the vet last week.

I am getting suspicious. Now I saw Mrs. Human on the computer placing an order for my new and wonderful tuna fish food that arrives in small packets. How did I know? Because she was complaining about the price of course. Humans always complain about the prices, but you cannot eat prices.  Anyhow I am quite happy as long as the bowl is filled. I also have a sneaking feeling that she is controlling how much I eat. She used to throw the food in the bowl and fill it up now and again, but now I have to eat it all, empty the bowl and then I get more.

Something else. She has a bottle with some sort of liquid and she sprays it on my tuna fish. I will observe the situation, it is vey suspicious. This evening I was waiting in my usual place for my share of the human food. It was only when Mr. Human and Mrs. Human eventually agreed that a little piece of ham would be OK, they gave it to me. There is no skedaddling any more, everything is carefully planned, I seem to be getting special treatment.

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Skedaddle

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Notes

Tabby

“Tabby could you perhaps retract your claws. I do not see any enemies here.”

“I was just practicing Mrs. Human to see if they are sharp enough.”

“Sharp enough for what?”

“I thought I would go outside and leave a few messages on the trees to show who is in charge here.”

“As long as you do not leave your scratches on my furniture.”

“No problem Mrs. Human, I did that some time ago, and you did not even notice. That is the problem with my notes, they fade after a while. I could of course refresh them. You would definitely feel safer.”

“No thankyou Tabby. Thanks for the offer, but I feel safe enough without any additional cat scratches on the furniture.”

“But as  a unique speciality of the day, I could make a few ornamental scratches with curves.”

“Just go outside and carve a few signs in the trees, I am sure that would do the job nicely.”

“I could spray the apartment as well to give it a unique flavour.”

“Tabby go and spray and scratch outside, this is my territory.”

“Only because I let you have it, rent free with a tuna fish supplement and service included. Are you sure you do not want a free spray? It would really add something special to the home.”

“Tabby outside.”

“OK, just asking.”

Feline RDP Monday: Feline Notes