The game I play is catch the mouse
If I find one in the house
They seem to avoid me, I do not know why
I am such a kind feline, would never make them cry
Of course they do not enter at free will
Perhaps they realise I only want to kill
If I let them live and begin to play
The other felines would laugh and call me a fay
Feline RDP Saturday: Feline Games
Of course I can squat. Squatting is a past time for all felines. It is a comfortable position to keep an eye on your surroundings.
If you see your humans eating food that should by rights be yours, then squat and watch them intensely. It gives them a so-called guilty conscience, which is an expression that only exists in the human language. We have no need for being guilty about anything in meow because we are so perfect. Just stare at your humans and they will get the impression that they are doing something wrong. Eventually some food samples will be passed onto you, although I must complain. Mrs. Human just throws it on the floor, how brutal. I would prefer it served in a bowl. She has the impression that we felines have no feelings for the finesse of eating. Although I must admit, if the food suits my appetite I eat it all the same. It might otherwise give her ideas that I do not like it.
Every time she gives me from her dish her first words are “don’t be fussy and eat it”. This is because I do not pounce on the food when it arrives. We felines like to preserve a little dignity and show the human that we are not food slaves (although we are).
Actually I squat in most places. It is an alternative to the sleeping position. I even squat in my recycling tray and also when I produce hairballs. Yes, it is an important position in the feline way of life.
Feline RDP Saturday: Squatting Feline
Exulting exists not in meow
We have no word for it and also do not know how
Felines are always the centre of their seeing
I, me and myself are the essence of well-being
Who cares about the others I am the only one
that matters to Mrs Human, for me will always run
So bring me tuna, also meat, I have trained her very well
The main object in her human life is to ensure my life is swell
She exults at every call I make, even cleaning out my tray
It is an honour for her daily duty, I make her life OK
Without me her day would be boring and so I keep her busy
Although she says that all this work is making her so dizzy
If it were not for us, the humans would still be in the trees
But we fulfil them with a purpose in life to get down on their knees
Feline RDP Saturday: Feline Exultation
“Tabby do you have something to say to a crash?”
“Who me, Mrs. Human. It is my bed time and I will now be crashing out on my bed. No more time, I only have 23 hours for a sleep and I have to fit the other hour into finding a new sleeping place, having a wash and a meal. Let’s crash another time, when I am awake.”
Feline RDP Saturday: Feline Crash
Zip? I am still looking for it. You know how hot it gets in this fur coat in Summer. I almost melt. We have a faulty design on our bodies. We cats need to breathe in summer and they forgot to insert the zip. It is most annoying, but one day I will find it and then you will see me in my complete form. In the meanwhile keep searching. Our cousins, the sphynx cats have no problem. They never got their fur coat, although I think they would like one in the Winter.
Feline RDP Saturday: Feline Zip
I saw a feline in my territory and am on my way through my cat flap. How dare he enter without my permission. I am now going to have a few paw swipes with him and if the worst happens, there is only one solution. I will hiss, and apply my special attack mode with fire in my eyes and then, there is only one way to deal with the problem.
I will turn on my paws and retreat through my cat flap a fast as I can. He might be bigger than me and perhaps stronger. There is no point in getting injured is there? That would mean a visit to the vet, who is even a worst enemy and I would even save Mrs. Human money as she is always telling me that vet bills are expensive.
Yes I am a thoughtful feline, and always think of the others first, after I have thought about myself.
Feline RDP Saturday: Seething Feline
Here I am basking in the sun
Oh what a wonderful feeling
I stretch my paws, absorb it all
Life is so appealing
Then a butterfly flies by my nose
She is so pretty, smells fine
I swipe at her, she cannot fly, and now she is all mine
And so I turn and and relax on my back
A light breeze ruffles the fur
I close my eyes, relax again and then begin to purr
Life is good in the summer months,
When I relax on my shoulders
I am preparing for the fight ahead
When I meant the leafy soldiers
The are waiting above and hiding in trees
waiting for September
But then my basking days are over
The Autumn I remember
Leaf soldiers attack and know no mercy
They tumble on the grass
But I am ready with claws that fight
I am top in the cat class
But now I relax and savour the warmth
I concentrate on the task
It is a hard life being a feline
And now I must train to bask
Feline RDP Saturday: Basking Feline