Feline RDP Wednesday: Feline Sport

Tabby

Sport? I train every day. No-one sleeps better than I do. I have been training since I was a kitten. My body is designed for sleep. I feel the urge and without wasting any time I begin to think of my sleeping pattern. Have you ever seen a feline with insomnia? Of course not, we spend most of our lives practicing. I am now perfect.

Where you sleep is not so important but how you sleep. First of all take up the pole position, preferable where you see your surroundings. Higher places are recommended, or surrounded by three walls, with an opening to have everything under control. Before even thinking of closing your eyes you must go through the routine of circling clockwise three times around your axis.  This is very soothing to the whiskers. When this part is completed, you may sink onto the surface. It is advisable to curl the tail around your paws, although not an absolute necessity. If there is room you may also stretch. I prefer change in my sleeping positions. It is less boring. And then close your eyes and drift away, although only one eye is completely shut from the outside world. We felines have a safety mechanism built into the other eye that registers any vibration of the air in the surroundings.

It is also advisable to sleep on a human bed. You can then completely relax and the human is also guarding your privacy in such moments. Yes, sleep is a wonderful game, it needs practice, but I win every time.

Feline RDP Wednesday: Feline Sport

Feline RDP Wednesday: Feline Colour

Tabby

“Thank is not very nice Tabby, poking out your pink tongue.”

“My tongue is what? Am I ill, do I have to go to that torture chamber you call the vet to have my tongue replaced?”

“No, Tabby, all felines have a pink tongue, it matches your pink nose.”

“Pink does not exist in meow Mrs. Human. We do not do colours. If it breathes and moves and smells good, then eat it. No matter what colour it might be, the main thing is that we enjoy.

One of the reasons that the vitamin pellets are not so attractive. You are feeding me dead matter. Vitamin pellets do not move and the only good vitamin pellets are those fresh from the bag. They still have that taste allure that the others do not have. Give me good old fashioned tuna fish straight from the tin any time.”

“Yes Tabby, the conversation always reverts to tuna fish.”

“The feline ambosia.”

“And that is also pink Tabby.”

“Mrs. Human forget this colour thing. There I was having a nice quiet sleep and you being to ask silly questions again. I have always found my way home, and I do not follow the colours, I have other secret methods. By the way did you see that mouse in the field on the other side of my territory.?”

“No Tabby, that is too far away.?

“You see Mrs. Human, colour is not everything. If you had whiskers you would have noticed it by the vibrations. And no I cannot see colours with my whiskers, they are for my seventh sense which you do not have.”

“But you only have six senses.”

“Forget it, it is too complicated for a human, otherwise we will go into the realm of talking to walls.”

Feline RDP Wednesday: Feline Colour

Feline RDP Wednesday: Feline Comeback

Tabby

If I go for a walk, I always come back
I feel it in my whiskers, it is a matter of fact
We felines need our home, the place that has our smell
Cushions in the corners, a bed is also swell
All doors are to be open, so we can roam around
And every day must be the same to keep our instincts sound
I inspect my outside territory, everything must be in place
Each twig and blade of grass must occupy its space
In Autumn leaf soldiers fall, I fight a battle daily
I kill each leaf with all my claws, and do it all quite gayly
But home is where the whiskers are, am still looking for my heart
Follow the smell with your delicate nose and never let it part

Feline RDP Wednesday: Feline Comeback

Feline RDP Wednesday: Inspiring Feline

Tabby

Mrs. Human is constantly taking photos of me. She is inspired by my natural feline features, my beauty. I must admit when I need a few quiet moments to myself, it is not exactly ideal when someone tells you to look in this or that direction. I usually look away to show who is the boss, but she tricked me with this photo.

She was settling down to her daily sleep after lunch and I decided I would join her. I remember the days when my mum would sleep and we kittens would all begin our paw exercises laying next to her until we were all sleeping. So Mrs Human lays on the bed, I get a little closer and begin to move my two front paws up and down, the duvet is so soft. Suddenly Mrs. Human is awake, grabs her telephone camera and takes a quick photo. That is not fair as I do not have time to look in the other direction.

One advantage is that you now see the depth of my beauty. Look at those wonderful eyes.    Humans say they are green, although I do not do colour. And the whiskers, so perfect. And can you see the MacDonalds “M” on my forehead. Ok, it needs some imagination, but it is an impressionist version in the style of Whiskers Picasso. I am sure I have now inspired you all to possess a copy of this photo. for one tin of tuna fish to be sent to my home, you will get a signed photo with my own paw print, what a bargain.

Feline RDP Wednesday: Inspiring Feline