Daily Feline Prompt: Funneling Feline

Tabby

“Tabby that is my bed.”

“Mrs Human, that is a matter of opinion. When I moved in I took over and engaged you as my own private slave. Everything in your possession now belongs to me and so it is my bed, although I lease it out to you for usage during the night.”

“Thank you so much Tabby, I am so lucky to have such an understanding owner as you are, but I am not keen on pawprints on my bed.”

“I am also not so keen on it being occupied during the night but even leaders have to make exceptions. There are times when I also like to lay in soft surroundings.”

“Tabby you have two sleeping cushions, an armchair and a settee at your disposal during the night. You really do not need my bed as well.”

“Not “as well” Mrs. Human, but “instead”. ”

“And where shall I sleep?”

“A sleeping  cushion?”

“Tabby there is a certain difference in size between a human and a feline.”

“Not my problem if your evolutionary programme had a flaw, the result being the wrong size.   Based on the words of Purry Kurt Vonnegut Katz,  the human brain was said to be the crowning glory of evolution, but  a very poor scheme for survival. Thank goodness for  the intelligence of the feline and its gifts of organisation.”

“Don’t believe everything you find on your pawpad Tabby, it’s my bed and time for a midday sleep after dinner.”

“No problem, just move over and make room and apply your opposable thumbs to give me a tummy tickle before we both fall asleep.”

“You mean that there was a positive side to our evolution.”

“Just the opposable thumbs Mrs. Human, but don’t let it go to your head. Felines first as always. And now you can give me a nice light stroke on my chin.”

Daily Feline Prompt: Non-funneling Feline