Feline RDP Monday: Spartan Cat

“Mrs.Human, it is cold outside and the leaf soldiers on the trees are preparing for battle, I am returning to my home.”

“Tabby there are no leaf soldiers, they are leaves falling from the trees, because the weather is getting colder.”

“And what if one of the leaves falls on my head? It is a dangerous life that I lead.”

“Tabby a leaf is not heavy and you will survive, such a spartanic feline as you are. You should eat your vitamin pellets like a brave feline to give you strength and stamina and perseverance.”

“Another human trick to feed me with food that I do not like or need. All felines are strong and resistant by nature and do not need such strange food. A nice piece of fish, even chicken or steak would do. Those pellets are so tasteless, only fit for hairball production. And why should I be tough and strong. I have humans for the energetic work.”

“But Tabby you should really be more independent.”

“Independence is my middle name Mrs. Human. I wash myself daily and sleep all on my own with no problems. All I need are opposable thumbs to open the tuna fish tins, and you do that for me. For something I have to have a human. I even visit my recycling tray on my own, just need a human to empty it. What could be better?”

“You really have an easy life Tabby.”

No Mrs. Human, think of the logistics I have to work on. Planning your day for my needs. It is a hard life being the support of the human race.”

“Of course, Tabby. And now please excuse me, I have to operate the tin opener with my opposable thumbs to ensure that the chief feline gets his deserved rewards from the tuna fish tin.”

Feline RDP Monday: Spartan Cat